A gorgeous young lady named Lin
Plied me with whisky and gin.
Then, along with Miss Rose
We took off our clothes ..
I blame the whisky and gin!
Author Archives: K Morris Poet
The Movies
A young lady whose name is Lou
Makes her money from movies most blue.
But she’s not as shocking
As that naughty Miss Hocking.
And I really must return Lou’s shoe!
There Once Was a Young Man of Calcutta
There once was a young man of Calcutta
Who lay drunk in that fine city’s gutter.
A stray dog walking by
Said, with a great sigh,
“Do you know that is my favourite gutter?”.
There Once Was a Girl From Bombay
There once was a girl from Bombay
Who said, “the men they never stay”.
A man from Ealing
Danced on her ceiling.
So they threw him out of Bombay!
The Old Rake
My money spent
On short dresses.
And caresses,
Not meant.
Girls in high-heels
Never stay.
Time steals
Our day away.
Sinful Rose
A most sinful young lady named Rose
Is well known for stealing men’s clothes.
I must return a stocking
To that forgetful Miss Hocking.
But I can’t leave wearing no clothes!
The Rise and Fall of the Cassette Tape
I recall, as a teenager, recording plays and other things onto cassette tape. I also recollect that sinking feeling when the cassette tape became horribly tangled (those c120 tapes where amongst the worst offenders, at least in my memory).
Besides recording, I also built up (and still retain) a large library of spoken word cassettes, ranging from Stevenson’s Kidnapped through to The Turn of the Screw and When Eight Bells Toll.
Despite my memories of cassettes becoming mangled, I still have great affection for the technology, which perhaps explains why I still retain those spoken word cassettes from my childhood and teenage years.
I therefore confess to having given in to a certain amount of nostalgia as I listened to an item on BBC Radio 4’s Front Row about the rise and fall of the cassette tape, https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m000sz98. The item is about 10 minutes in length and can be found at the start of the podcast.
My Nigerian Girlfriend
I’m dating a girl from Nigeria
Whose tastes are so very superior.
She has this thing
For an expensive ring.
So I’m off now to Siberia!
Miss Kath’s Bath
When I found my friend Miss Kath
Taking a hot and very bubbly bath.
I took a look
For my prize duck.
But all I found was Miss Kath!
An Ordinary Day
After, they may
Chat of this and that.
He may say
Something about his ordinary day.
And she speak
Of her so humdrum week.
An hour on a Saturday
In which he does stray.
Then, it, being over
She dons her pullover.
But perhaps they may meet
One day next week.
