Tag Archives: funny poetry

Flow and Pearl

A young lady called Miss Flow
(whose mother I happen to know),
Is a very good girl
(unlike that Miss Pearl).
As all the young gentlemen know!

A Young Lady With A Beautiful Figure

A young lady with a beautiful figure
Said, “I will all gentleman’s offers consider.
I am of an ancient profession,
And confess to having no discretion.
But I do have a beautiful figure!”.


A young lady whose name is Sarah
Has a reputation as a terrible stirrer.
She’s told everyone about me
And that naughty Miss Leigh.
But, have you heard this about Sarah? …


When a young lady named Miss Bess
Said, “would you like to go express?”.
I said, “you ought to know
That I like to go slow.
Oh, you mean the express train, Bess!”.

When A Young Lady Waving A Gun

When a young lady waving a gun
Said, “I hope you’re up for fun!”.
And I said, “If not,
Then Will I be shot?”.
She said, “Just try it, and run!”.

Betty’s Spaghetti

When a young lady named Betty
Tried to feed me poisoned spaghetti.
I said, “me and Murry
Are off for a curry.
But Betty, please eat your spaghetti!”.


A young lady whose name is Pearl
Has a job as a working girl.
I’ve oft seen her writing,
Which is not that exciting.
But she works as a working girl.

There Once Was A Vampire Named Keith

There once was a vampire named Keith
Who, in a fight lost his teeth
A dentist called Bangs
Gave him false fangs.
But Keith he still missed his teeth!

Mercenary Miss Gale

When a most mercenary young lady known as Gale
Tried her hand at the ancient art of blackmail,
And said, “I have photos of you
With me and that naughty Miss Lou”.
I said, “you are an extremely talented photographer Gale!”.

Sweet Music

A young lady whose name is White
Desiring to hear sweet music one night,
Asked an elderly gentleman called Morgan
To play on his old organ.
Which led to a most musical night.