Tag Archives: limerick

Guy with a Tie

There once was a guy with a tie

Who was plagued by a very large fly.

When a girl called Yvette

Said, “is he your pet?”

He swatted that fly with his tie!

Miss Prism

When a beautiful young lady named Miss Prism

Said, “the sun he has long since risen”.

I said, “the moon

Will come out soon –

And have you ever been good Miss Prism …!”

Ark

I awake to rain again.

Should I build an ark?

If I do the shark …

My thoughts grow far too dark …

 

A bear in my bed

Would keep me from sleep

For fear that it would eat  …

 

I have no dread of the pussycat,

But what of the mouse and rat …

For the poor pussycat

Must be fed …

 

I do like dogs

Yet fear they would gobble up frogs!

 

I imagine the crocodile’s smile

As he lies, just like a log

Waiting for some cat or unfortunate dog

To pass by …

 

On second thoughts, perhaps I

Should wait for the rain to stop

For I can not chop wood in rain …

Strawberries and Cream

When a young lady eating strawberries and cream

Went and told me about her weird dream,

I said to her, “Lee,

That seems strange to me!”

As she covered me in strawberries and cream!

flâneur

When I met a young lady named Flair

Who said, “sir, you are merely a flâneur!”

I said, “I observe the street

And many people I meet.

But Flair, tell me what is a flâneur !”

Andy the Dandy

My friend whose name is Andy

Has a reputation as a dandy.

He thought Miss Mandy hot

And offered her cheap chocolate.

But Mandy she preferred a shandy!

 

Bella’s Complaint

When a young lady named Miss Bella

Went and called me a rude fella,

I said, “my language isn’t crude!

And you madam are most rude!

You are thinking of some other fella!”

There Once Was an Author Named Kafka

There once was an author named Kafka

Whose books are all lacking in laughter.

There can be no denial,

For I have it on file:

His books are all lacking in laughter.

Role Play

When a dominant young lady named Fay

Said, “lets all indulge in role play!”

And severe Miss Jane

Produced a large cane,

I made my excuses that day …!

A Young Lady Whose Name is Mustard

A young lady whose name is Mustard

Said, “you are a no good bustard!”

I said to her, “Beth,

You bore me to death!

Go wash your hair in egg custard!”