A young lady whose name is Mustard
Said, “you are a no good bustard!”
I said to her, “Beth,
You bore me to death!
Go wash your hair in egg custard!”
A young lady whose name is Mustard
Said, “you are a no good bustard!”
I said to her, “Beth,
You bore me to death!
Go wash your hair in egg custard!”
There once was a man named Billy
Who composed poems both profound and silly.
At a great funeral wake
He drowned in a lake,
Whilst reciting a silly poem to Lilly.
I was delighted to learn that one of my poems, (a limerick) was read during a recent broadcast of Vancouver Co-Op Radio’s The World Poetry Reading Series. The gentleman who read it, Victor did, I think do an excellent job of doing so.
To listen to my poem being read please visit this link, http://www.coopradio.org/content/world-poetry-caf%C3%A9-61.
Please note, the reading takes place approximately 10-12 minutes into the podcast.
Kevin
There once was a writer named Hugh
Who, wishing to write something new,
Flew straight to the moon
In a hot air balloon.
But he still couldn’t write anything new.
—
There once was a writer named Hugh
Who, wishing to write something new,
Flew straight to the moon
With a heated silver spoon,
Pursued by a copper called Lou!
When a young man whose name is Moore
Called me a crushing bore,
I spoke of pink plastic ducks
And multicoloured rubber hooks,
But first I locked the door!
There was a young man named Moore
Who had lovers by the score.
But his wife Jane
Began to complain,
So he cut them down to 4!
When a young lady whose name is Heather
Went out in windy weather,
She wore an extremely short dress,
Which I must confess
Was not exactly clever!
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He said, with a sigh
“I don’t know why
My wife, she sleeps under our bed”!
—
When a sailor whose name is Mark
Said, “this world is bleak and dark”,
His second cousin Jim
Jumped in to swim
And was eaten by a shark!
When a young admirer of Titian
Made a most shocking admission,
I shook my grey head
And with great sorrow said,
“You are on the road to perdition”!
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He whispered, “upon my life,
You are not my wife.
Speak softly, as she’s sleeping in bed”!
—
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He said, with a sigh,
“I am an open-minded guy,
But my wife she is sleeping in bed”!
—
When a man whose name is Ted
Found a young lady under his bed
He said, “is that you Nell?,
I can not tell
Whether you be living or dead”!