Tag Archives: funny poems

When a Young Lady Named Lake

When a young lady named Lake
Leapt out of my birthday cake,
I said, “you are witty
And more than just pretty,
And you have ruined my cake!”

I Know a Young Barmaid Named Lou

I know a young barmaid named Lou
Who pours beer through her favourite shoe.
I have a fetish
For Flair’s wet lettuce,
But the vicar he loves Lou’s shoe!

Love Triangle

A young lady whose name is Claire
Is keen on a girl called Flair.
But Flair burns for Sue
Who (strictly between us 2),
Has always had a thing for Claire!

When a Brave Young Lady Named Beth

When a brave young lady named Beth
Came face to face with grim Death,
She said, “you will find
That the devil lurks behind!”,
But Death he was completely stone deaf!

I Know a Young Lady from France

I know a young lady from France
Who is an expert in erotic dance.
My friend Lin
Condemns her sin,
And Lin’s husband he works in France …!

Dawn and the Vicarage Lawn

There was a young lady named Dawn
Who made love on the vicarage lawn.
A passing parishioner
Applied lawn conditioner,
Which disconcerted the good vicar and Dawn!

I Met a Young Lady Named Patricia

I met a young lady named Patricia
Who said she works as a stripper.
I went to her shop
Where I found Miss Hopp,
Who assists Patricia as a wallpaper stripper …!

Ria Who Spent Her Days Drinking Beer

There was a young lady named Ria
Who spent all her days drinking beer.
While drunk on wine
Her friend Miss Divine
Drowned in a barrel of Ria’s beer!

Internet Dating

We haven’t met before
Yet you say you adore
Me, and call me
“Baby”. Well, my dear lady,
Learn this lesson hard,
I aint your baby, lady
And I am not
Falling for your plot
To steal my credit card …!

A Young Man Driving a Large Hearse

A young man driving a large hearse
Said, “this verse is unfinished and terse”. …