Tag Archives: funny poems

Miss Witty

When a very attractive young lady named Witty
Said, “some say that I’m more than just pretty”.
I said, “you are nice.
Let us play at dice”.
Then, I played all night with miss Witty.

Monk And His Skunk

There once was a poet named Monk
Who owned a most disreputable old skunk.
His verse being real bad
It drove the skunk mad.
And Monk he was always half-drunk!

A Young Lady Wearing Tight Shoes

When a young lady wearing tight shoes
Said, “I shall tell you my views
On the subject of politics,
And dogs who chase sticks.”
I said, “just pass me the booze!”.

A Young Lady Wearing Very Tight Shoes

A young lady wearing very tight shoes
Said, “I shall tell you my views
On the subject of politics,
And dogs who chase sticks.
But first, I must change these shoes!”.

There Once Was A Man Named Ray

There once was a man named Ray
Who composed a poem once a day.
A young lady called Rose
Said, “that’s nought but prose.
And your hair has turned quite grey!”.

 

All Poemed Out

When a young man named Prout
Said, “you are all poemed out!”.
I gave him a poke
And said, “sir, you joke!”.
And then I kicked Prout out!

A Young Lady Walking In A beautiful Wood

a young lady walking in a beautiful wood
Said, “sir, I am known for being good.
My name is miss Bess
And I’ve lost my dress.
Have you found it here in this wood?”.

A Young Lady Wearing 1 Stiletto

A young lady wearing 1 stiletto
Was extremely fond of chocolate gateau.
Being imperfect at rhyme
She spent her time
Entertaining gentlemen whilst covered in gateau.

I Once Had A Friend Named Hogg

I once had a friend named Hogg
Who lived by an ancient peat bog.
When I said, “your sister,
I just cant resist her”,
It ended in that ancient peat bog!

A Beautiful Young Lady Climbing the Stairs

A beautiful young lady climbing the stairs
Said, “I suffer from very bad nightmares”! .
I said, “my dear miss Elane,
That must cause you great pain.
Shall we dine on apples and pears?”

When a beautiful young lady climbing the stairs
Said, “I’m afflicted by the most horrible nightmares!”.
I said, “my dear miss elane,
That must cause you great pain.
And your bedroom is up these here stairs?”