Tag Archives: funny poems

Miss Vickers Knickers

A young lady whose name is Vickers
Is well known for losing her knickers.
A bishop called Paul
Says, “we all fall”,
As he admires those knickers of Vickers …!

I Once Met a Good Time Girl

I once met a good time girl
Who said, “do give me a whirl!
And tell me honey,
Do you have money? …?”,
But I’d spent it all on Pearl …!

When a Young Lady Named Miss White

When a young lady named Miss White
Invited me round to hers last night,
We swung from the ceiling
With a girl from Ealing,
And my wife she started a fight!

There Once Was a Girl Called Lou

There once was a girl called Lou
Who wrote a poem upon her shoe.
A young man named Neil
Said, “you’re down at heel.
And your poem it won’t do Lou!”.

Heels and Seals

There was a young lady in heels
Who was fond of swimming with seals.
The men, full of beer
Would stand near and cheer,
As they loved to watch those seals!

When a Forward Young Lady Named Fay

When a forward young lady named Fay
Said, “sir, you are old and gray!”,
I composed a rhyme
About old Father Time
And Fay whose hair will turn gray!

When a Ghost Travelling in a Carriage

When a ghost travelling in a carriage
Said, “do come with me to Harwich!”,
I said, “you stupid old ghoul!
You must think me a fool!
As your carriage is already in Harwich!”

Slaughter

I once met a man named Slaughter
Who had a most beautiful young daughter.
She said to me, “good sir,
You can admire my blonde hair,
But my father’s name it is Slaughter!”

Ling’s Swing

When a young lady named Ling
Said, “do come round and swing!”,
I went round with Miss Lou
And a pretty vicar called Sue,
But we couldn’t find Ling’s swing …!

Dancing by Moonlight

There was a young lady named White
Who liked to dance nude by moonlight.
And when the sun rose
She’d put on her clothes.
But the men all enjoyed the moonlight!