Tag Archives: funny poetry

Whilst Drunk On All Kinds of Booze

Whilst drunk on all kinds of booze
I borrowed my new girlfriend’s stiletto shoes.
And walked through the town
Wearing nought but her nightgown.
Did you see me on the news?

There Once Was a Nymph Named Fay

There once was a nymph named Fay
Who liked to play in the hay.
The local squire
Had a desire.
But that nymph she refused to play!

My Easter Egg

When a beautiful young lady named Meg
Leapt out of my large Easter egg,
I said, “my dear sweet miss
I would give you a kiss.
But you have ruined my Easter egg!”.

Lyme Who Fought a Duel with Old Father Time

There once was a young man named Lyme
Who fought a duel with Old Father Time.
But, as day followed day
Old Father Time slipped away.
For only a fool will duel with time.

The Easter Bunny

I met a young lady named Honey
Who was dressed as the Easter Bunny.
I said, “are you up for fun?”.
And she produced a very big gun.
So that bunny got all my money!

A very happy Easter to all of my readers!

Kevin

There Once Was a Man Named Rory

There once was a man named Rory
Who was a traditional one nation Tory.
His lover Miss White
Was a true Thatcherite.
And her boyfriend he didn’t like Rory!

Miss Box

There once was a young lady named Box
Whose habit it was to ride a fox.
As she rode around town
In her most flimsy nightgown
The vicar yelled, “I still have your socks!”.

Whilst Whirling in a Very Fast Waltz

Whilst whirling in a very fast waltz
A young lady said, “are you false?”.
I said, “all our romance
‘Tis brief as this dance.
So lets just enjoy this sweet waltz!”.

Ted’s Bed

There once was a young man named Ted
Who lay dozing upon a brand new bed.
A young lady called Claire
Said, “do excuse me sir,
But are you going to buy that bed?”.

Gentleman’s Club

My dear friend, the talented and beautiful Miss Rose
Works in a club where they say anything goes.
There is lots of fine wine
And all the girls are divine.
And I’m off now to retrieve all my clothes ..