Tag Archives: funny poetry

There Once Was A Man Who, Whilst Drinking

There once was a man who, whilst drinking
Slurred, “this here boatit is surely sinking”.
A young lady named Claire
Said, “sir, take great care!”,
And the seagulls they cried, “you are sinking!”.

When My Dog Found A Stocking

When my dog found a stocking
Belonging to beautiful young miss Hocking,
The vicar looked grim
And spoke of sin.
But the dog found nothing shocking!

When my dog found a stocking
Belonging to beautiful young miss Hocking,
The vicar looked grim
And spoke of sin.
And her boyfriend he came knocking!

When A Gorgeous Young Lady Named Frida

When a gorgeous young lady named Frida
Said, “I’d make a most excellent breeder!”.
I said, “lets have fun
In this hot summer sun.
But please, can we forget the breeder!”.

Whilst Declaiming My Poetry To A Crowd

Whilst declaiming my poetry to a crowd
In a town that’s known as Stroud,
A young lady dressed in white
Said, “sir, it’s long after midnight,
And your voice is far too loud!”.

Leigh Who Composed Poetry Whilst Climbing A Tree

There once was a young lady named Leigh
Who composed rhyming poetry whilst climbing a tree.
But her hands did slip
Causing a fractured right hip.
And a critic to praise Leigh’s fine poetry!

A Young Lady of Pleasure

I know a young lady of pleasure
Who says that her name is Heather.
She likes the sunshine
And drinking red wine.
Tell me, is her name really Heather?

In May

When a young lady said, “come May
All young lovers they dance and play”.
I said, “my dear,
The Autumn draws near.
And my hair has turned quite grey!”.

Leigh Who Needed Money

When a young lady named Leigh
Said, “I’ll be honest with thee.
My sweet darling honey
I need some money”.
I said, “go ask a bee!”.