Tag Archives: lucifer

Sunday Humour

Last night as I walked in
I heard a terrible din.
There by the fireplace
Dressed in silk and lace
Sat the devil drinking my neat gin!

Last night as I walked in
I heard a terrible din.
There by my fireplace
Dressed in silk and lace
Sat Lucifer playing the violin.

Last night as I lay in sleep
The devil into my room did creep.
I remember her sweet scent
And the time we spent
And now I’m off to sleep …

As I went to bed last night
I met a young lady called White.
When I said “what are you doing here!?”
She replied “autumn evenings are so drear”.
‘So please, turn out the light”.

The Fox and the Devil

Lucifer fell
Into a well
And said, “I wonder who herein does dwell?
The dark be dammed, its blacker than hell!”

“Tis I”, said the fox sly,
I too fell in here.
‘Tis clear
I will die.
Yet, I am the bolder
Of we two.
Let me stand upon your shoulder
And cause a to-do!
Never fear
I will summon help here.

So the devil did accept
And the fox leapt
Up on to Satan’s shoulder
And being the bolder
Of the two
himself out.
You should have heard the devil shout!
“A pox
On you fox.
Come back forthwith
And give
Me a hand”
He did command.

Said the fox sly
“No thank you, I will fly
Far away.
For the sake of humanity, ‘Tis better you dwell
Forever in this well”,
And truth to tell
He will there remain
Until the terrain
Of Hell freezes over.
Truly, God is in clover!


The better man hides inside.
As a snake
Does wake
And we forsake
Kindness, that like a river should flow
And lose ourselves in hate and woe.

We know what is right
And oft in the depths of night
Look into our soul.
We ssee the whole
Thing crystal clear.
All our fears
And empty tears.

Let the serpent go
For we reap what we sew.
An open heart
Can not by the devil’s art
Be made black
Only a lack
Of will
Can our soul kill



The fruit grows within easy reach.

How simple to take a peach

Or plum.

How delightfully does temptation come.

The juice turns to gall.

Better to let the fruit fall

or be gathered by other hands.

But desire commands

us to pick

and sip.

The devil’s tune seems sweet

and once our feet

begin to dance

We have no chance

To stop

but must waltz until we drop.

The Potentate

Lucifir came for a potentate bold.

He said “you have had power and wealth untold,

Now you must render me your immortal soul”.

The potentate sighed,

And made reply,

“My soul it died,

you will find nothing inside.

It perished long ago,

And vanished like the summer snow.

Once I had ideals,

and yearned to build utopia in green fields.

I have waded in much blood,

And sacrificed the weak for the common good.

My soul you had long ago.

I take your hand,

Now let us go”.


When The Devil Drives

“Needs must when the devil drives”.

Surely the Prince of Darkness doesn’t drive himself. I mean the undisputed ruler of Hell must have a demon or perhaps a damned soul to chauffeur him around. It stands to reason doesn’t it? On the other hand,maybe Lucifer finds all those flunkies somewhat tedious and this explains why he drives himself.

As for the car, I suspect this must be a real gas guzzler as the Devil, to state the blatantly obvious has no concern for the environment. Hold on a minute though, I have heard a rumour that a number of public relations specialists have the ear of the Prince of Darkness. They are, I understand attempting to persuade him to “go green” and invest in a bicycle thereby enhancing his credibility with the environmental movement. “Sinister green” or “A darker shade of green” have, I believe been mooted as possible slogans to spearhead the campaign.

One final thought, does Lucifer abide by all relevant traffic regulations? Answers please on a postcard to:

The Porter’s Lodge,

Hell’s Gate

Macbeth Towers