Tag Archives: funny poetry

Loose Morals

A bishop riding on a goose

Said, “modern morals are too loose!”.

The creature said, “honk!”,

Which rhymes with bonk,

As it’s morals where somewhat loose!

Miss Lou’s Fetish

When I met a young lady named Lou

Who said, “I’ll explore my fetish with you!”,

I began to dream

Of strawberries and cream.

But Lou’s shoe left me black and blue!

 

A Beautiful Young Vampire Named Miss White

A beautiful young vampire named Miss White

Promised to be my lover last night.

I offered her steak,

Which was a mistake

As I got no loving last night!

The Pretty Maid

I know a most pretty young maid

And many a game we have played.

Her hair has a kink

And she dresses in pink

And I hear she’s the vicars maid!

 

Knuckle Sandwich

I met a man digging a ditch

Who kindly offered me a knuckle sandwich.

A girl named Kate

Passed me a plate

Which amused that man in that ditch!

Causing a Commotion

I know a young lady named Ocean

Who is fond of causing a commotion.

She jumps in my bath

And all my friends laugh,

And my girlfriend she causes a commotion!

The Dangers of Technology

When a young man, just for a laugh

Went and used his laptop in the bath,

There came a bang.

All the angels sang,

And he flew all the way to Bath!

Miss Lock’s Fetish

When a young lady named Miss Lock

Tied me to a very old clock,

And I said, “is this your fetish?”,

She whacked me with a large lettuce,

As for me, I said, “tick tock!”.

There Once Was a Nymph Named Echo

There once was a nymph named Echo

Who spent all her days drinking Prosecco.

When they said, “is that nice?”,

She would repeat their words twice,

And then she would drink more Prosecco!

Here Comes a Chopper to Chop Off my Head!

When a wicked young man named Ted

Said, “I shall chop off your head!”,

And his friend Max

Passed him an axe,

I found I was dreaming in bed!