Monthly Archives: August 2020

Moral Miss Coral

A young lady named Miss Coral
Is so extremely stern and moral.
A girl called Ria
Swings from my chandelier.
But I can’t afford Miss Coral.

Flair

My friend whose name is Flair
Has enjoyed many a sordid affair.
The great philosophy professor
Owns a welsh dresser.
And I’ve seen Flair dancing there.

A young lady whose name is Flair
Has indulged in many a sordid affair.
The daughter of archbishop Kipper
Is employed as a stripper.
And her stage name, it is Flair!

When A Young Lady Eating Bananas

When a young lady eating bananas
Said, “do you sell see-through pyjamas?”.
A shop assistant named Paul
Pointed to the opposite wall.
But she couldn’t see any pyjamas!

I Am A Man

I am a man
And have respect
For women.
Yet a high-heel shoe
And a smooth, perfect
Leg
Turns my thoughts to sinning
And to bed.

I find
That an empty mind
Does not attract.
But a giggle.
A wriggle
And a vacuous smile,
May distract
For a while.

A Young Lady Wearing Just Pink Socks

A young lady wearing just pink socks
Said, “my behaviour it so frequently shocks.
I can hear the knocking
Of the Lord Bishop Hocking.
I wonder will he like my socks?”.

When A Young Lady Waving A Rifle

When a young lady waving a rifle
Said, “I hope you like my trifle”.
I said, “it’s very good,
But, I was wondering could,
You please stop waving around that rifle!”.

There Once Was A Poet Named Lyme

There once was a poet named Lyme
Who composed poems about nothing but time.
Whilst drinking one day,
The sky turned grey.
And the great publican, he called time.

Clock

I forget the ticking of the clock.
But recollect it, when I stop.
Is time benign?
Long after
I have reached my end,
Perchance a friend,
Suddenly hearing the tick tock
Of the clock
Will think on former laughter,
And their own, inevitable end.