Tag Archives: humorous verse

There Once Was a Very Precocious Housefly

There once was a very precocious housefly
Who said, “all men must surely die”.
A man named Ray
Aimed the fly spray,
And wept as he sprayed that housefly!

Cook’s Book

When a young man whose name is Cook
Said, “please will you look at my book?”,
An old lady called Yvette
Said, “its not written yet!”.
So I haven’t yet looked at Cook’s book!

When My Beautiful Young Mistress Miss White

When my beautiful young mistress Miss White
Said, “if I should die this night …”.
I said, “you want me to know
That you have always loved me so!”.
She said, “no, its not quite that
Please, take care of my old cat”.
I said, “oh! but he scratches so!”

The Squire and His Young Wife Moriah

Whilst visiting my dear old friend the squire
I was entertained by his young wife Moriah.
A housemaid named Spink
Gave us a wink.
I think that she’s close to the squire …!

Midnight Walk

Whilst walking home at just after midnight
I met a young lady in white
Who said, with a big smile,
“Do you think I have style!”,
And the graveyard was freezing at midnight …!

There Once Was an Eminent Old Professor

There once was an eminent old professor
Who lived in a large Welsh Dresser.
His student Maude
Got terribly bored
With polishing that dresser and her professor!

Responding to Criticism

Whilst out walking yesterday, I bumped into an acquaintance.
“I like your poems. I’m not sure about the limericks though”.

His comment concerning my latest collection “Leaving and Other Poems” made me smile. I appreciate good honest feedback and that is what I received.

I could have pointed out that others have said how much they enjoy my humorous verses, (which indeed they have). However, I said words to the following effect:
“I’m really pleased you like my poems”.
We chatted for a while about other matters, then we both went our separate ways.

I have seen other authors/poets become defensive when their writing is critiqued however gentle the criticism is. Whilst I completely understand why writers adopt this position – they have slaved long and hard over their computer to produce their work – not everyone is going to like everything you have written, and as authors/poets we need to accept this fact with grace and keep writing.

Some criticism is fair criticism and needs to be taken on the chin. We can (and should) learn from it. Where criticism becomes unacceptable is when it turns to personal attacks on the author or their family and friends. But provided it focuses on the writing it is fair as, once a book is out there it is no longer the sole property of the author. Of course he/she retains copyright, however readers have every right to interpret a book they have read as they wish.

In the case of my acquaintance, I am delighted he likes my “poems”, and I understand that my brand of humour is not to everyone’s taste. Indeed some readers dislike humorous verse in it’s entirety and they do, of course have every right to do so.

As always, I would be interested in the views of my readers.

(“Leaving and Other Poems” is available from Amazon in Kindle and paperback and can be found here, https://www.amazon.co.uk/Leaving-other-poems-Kevin-Morris-ebook/dp/B09R8NG6WQ).

Kevin

When I Attended a Large Swingers Convention

When I attended a large swingers convention
I sensed a good deal of tension.
My friend bishop Hocking
Stole the vicar’s stocking,
But the rest I’d better not mention …!

There Once Was a Vampire Named Keith

There once was a vampire named Keith
Who, on losing some of his teeth,
Visited a dentist called Lake,
Who used a great stake,
Which ended both Keith and his teeth!

Claire’s Improper Suggestion

When a young lady named Claire
Said, “lets all have an affair!”,
I said to Miss Hocking,
“That is really quite shocking!”.
But Hocking was busy with Claire!