Tag Archives: funny poem

There Once Was A Man Named Lyme

There once was a man named Lyme
Who, determined to conquer Old Father Time,
Covered up all the clocks
With his girlfriend’s new frocks.
And Old Father Time laughed at Lyme.

A Young Woman Wearing Bright Pink High-Heels

A young woman wearing bright pink high-heels
Went in to swim with the seals.
Being drunk on strong booze
She lost both her shoes.
Or so I’m told by those seals!

When A Beautiful But Dissolute Young Lady Named Ria

When a beautiful but dissolute young lady named Ria
Came round to mine and drank lots of beer,
A kindly old monk
Said, “you are drunk.
Let me help you to bed, young Miss Ria”.

When A Young Lady Dressed In Clear Plastic

When a young lady dressed in clear plastic
Said, “my morals they are really very elastic”.
I said, “its true
That mine stretch too.
And you are hot in that clear plastic!”.

When A Young Man On A Bar Stool

When a young man on a bar stool
Said, “you are a stupid old fool!”.
I said, “my good sir
You should take great care,
Lest you fall off that bar stool!”.

When a Daring Young Lady Named Ria

When a daring young lady named Ria
Decided to swing from my old chandelier,
The good Bishop Paul
Feared she would fall.
But she fell long ago, did Ria.

There Was a Young Lady Named Yvette

There was a young lady named Yvette
Who caused many rich gentlemen to forget
Their duty and sense,
Which led to expense.
And a contented and very wealthy Yvette.

When A Young Lady Most Enigmatical

When a young lady most enigmatical
Said, “you are far too fanatical”.
And I failed to comprehend,
She called me her friend.
And then we discussed the grammatical.

For Tomorrow We Die

When a young man whose name is Jerry
Said, “let us eat, drink and be merry”.
And I said, “for tomorrow we die”,
He said, “sir, “that is a lie!”.
As tomorrow I am getting married to Sherry!”.