Category Archives: poetry

I Know a Young Barmaid Named Lou

I know a young barmaid named Lou
Who pours beer through her favourite shoe.
I have a fetish
For Flair’s wet lettuce,
But the vicar he loves Lou’s shoe!

Just for the Record, Poems From a Time of Covid

I am pleased to announce that several of my poems have been included in “Just for the Record, Poems From a Time of Covid”.

Book Description

The Croydon Poetry Hour, was founded some years ago by Debby Grayson as a loose, inclusive network of people who meet regularly for the sheer pleasure of sharing the poems they have written, usually on a theme. During the Corona virus pandemic of 2020 – 2022, we did not set out to write about its impact as a group, but individually we produced poems arising out of our personal experiences, fears and hopes. The poems were written in a variety of styles and are evidence of the creativity that flows from giving poetry a try.

Where to Buy

“Just for the Record, Poems From a Time of Covid” is available for £2.20 from Lulu and can be found here, https://www.lulu.com/en/us/shop/croydon-poets/just-for-the-record/paperback/product-d2w5wq.html?page=1&pageSize=4

Love Triangle

A young lady whose name is Claire
Is keen on a girl called Flair.
But Flair burns for Sue
Who (strictly between us 2),
Has always had a thing for Claire!

There Once Was a Decent Old Tory

There once was a decent old Tory
Who went by the name of Rory.
When it came to the election
He indulged in much introspection,
Then reluctantly put his cross by Tory.

She Kissed Me

She,
Drunk
Kissed me.
Although she
Is not my type,
I am no monk
So thought of night
And a young woman who,
Its true
I more than like,
Though she Is not
My type.
But oh what
Bliss to kiss
And lose
Socks and shoes.
Me, I’m no monk,
But she was drunk.

The Night and the Light

Secret delights
At night.
The heart
Turns from white
To black.

In his art
He plays at
Turning back.

The night
And light
Oft fight
Behind man’s eyes.
And the wise
Know what is true,
That few
Are whole
In soul.

And behind our eyes
The night
And light
Perpetually fight
Until we
Enter eternity.

(This poem is somewhat disjointed, as are my thoughts on this matter).

I Know a Young Lady Named Maude

I know a young lady named Maude
Who makes love on an ironing board.
A man called Bret
Runs my local laundrette,
And he’s banned me and Miss Maude …!

When a Brave Young Lady Named Beth

When a brave young lady named Beth
Came face to face with grim Death,
She said, “you will find
That the devil lurks behind!”,
But Death he was completely stone deaf!