Category Archives: poetry

The Price of Vice

When a young lady named Price
Said, “do you 2 like vice?”
Me and Miss Leigh
Said, “we like 3!
But we can’t afford your price!”

Miss Price Who Skated on Thin Ice

There once was a lady named Price
Who liked to skate on thin ice.
A person named Dan
Being a wicked man,
Skated with Miss Price on that ice …!

A Young Lady Who is Never Nervous

A young lady who is never nervous
Is famous for giving a great service.
After a very quick drink
She said, with a wink,
“I’ll give that old banger a service!”

Louise and Bess

My friend whose name is Louise
Is known as a terrible tease.
Her best mate Bess
Will usually say yes,
But Louise is a terrible tease …!

I Once Had a Lover Named Moon

I once had a lover named Moon
Who, on swallowing a very large balloon,
Said, “I have such a thirst!
That I fear I shall burst!”
It was over too soon with Moon

An Ordinary Saturday

On my way
To eat breakfast
In a café
On an ordinary
Saturday, I heard birds.
While in Ukraine’s Kiev
Birdsong was drowned
Out by bombs.

(I stand with Ukraine)

When a Young Man in a Hurry

When a young man in a hurry
Fell into a big pit of slurry,
A chef named Jeff
Said to Miss Beth,
“Do hurry and serve him that curry!”

When a Young Man Named Mark

When a young man named Mark
Said, “go and clean this park!”
A girl called Gale
Grabbed a large pail
Which she emptied all over Mark!