I know a young lady named Ann
Who likes to date the older man.
My good friend Miss Claire
Says I have grey hair.
And Ann, she likes the older man …
Monthly Archives: April 2022
There is a Gorgeous Young Perfumer
There is a gorgeous young perfumer
Who has started a wicked rumour,
About me and her
And naughty Miss Claire.
How sad its just a rumour …
There Once Was a Very Precocious Housefly
There once was a very precocious housefly
Who said, “all men must surely die”.
A man named Ray
Aimed the fly spray,
And wept as he sprayed that housefly!
Cook’s Book
When a young man whose name is Cook
Said, “please will you look at my book?”,
An old lady called Yvette
Said, “its not written yet!”.
So I haven’t yet looked at Cook’s book!
When My Beautiful Young Mistress Miss White
When my beautiful young mistress Miss White
Said, “if I should die this night …”.
I said, “you want me to know
That you have always loved me so!”.
She said, “no, its not quite that
Please, take care of my old cat”.
I said, “oh! but he scratches so!”
As the Light Slowly Dimmed
As the light
Slowly dimmed
I took delight
In birds.
“Oh my god!”.
But words
Are not birds.
The Squire and His Young Wife Moriah
Whilst visiting my dear old friend the squire
I was entertained by his young wife Moriah.
A housemaid named Spink
Gave us a wink.
I think that she’s close to the squire …!
Midnight Walk
Whilst walking home at just after midnight
I met a young lady in white
Who said, with a big smile,
“Do you think I have style!”,
And the graveyard was freezing at midnight …!
I Remember You 2
I remember you two.
One of you,
In my living room
(I forget who)
Waited for your friend.
Was there perfume?
I can’t pretend
To remember names.
Alone, I telephoned
And you came.
There Once Was an Eminent Old Professor
There once was an eminent old professor
Who lived in a large Welsh Dresser.
His student Maude
Got terribly bored
With polishing that dresser and her professor!