Tag Archives: funny poetry

Miss Wong’s Sad Song

There was a young lady named Wong

Who sang many a very sad song.

When they said, “sing something glad!”,

She whacked them with her handbag,

Which was very wrong of Miss Wong!

When a Pretty Young Lady Named May

When a pretty young lady named May

Knocked on my door on Valentines Day,

And my dear old wife Claire

Screamed, “are you having an affair!”,

I turned to my sweet mistress Fay …

My Valentine’s Night

When a nubile young lady named White

Invited me out on Saint Valentine’s Night,

Miss Nell came as well

With the most Reverend Bell,

And the waitress she wore Angel Delight!

When a Young Lady Brandishing a Cucumber

When a young lady brandishing a cucumber

Awakened me from my very deep slumber,

And I said, “Mis Parrot,

Do you fancy a carrot?”.

She said, “no, I’m brandishing this cucumber!”.

A Beautiful Young Lady Named White

A beautiful young lady named White

Brought delight to me last night.

In a backstreet hotel

That I know well

We composed poetry all last night.

When a Scantily Clad Miss Lyme

When a scantily clad Miss Lyme

Said, “is this your first time?”,

A great poet I know

Said, “me and Miss flow,

We spend much time in rhyme”.

Pam

A young lady who is truly divine

Came round to mine for some wine.

Her name it is Pam.

Now she’s pushing a pram.

I wonder, will the baby like wine?

A Most Enterprising Young Lady Named Maddy

A most enterprising young lady named Maddy

Is looking for a rich sugar daddy.

When I had money

I was her honey.

But now I’ve been dumped by Maddy …

A Most Forgetful Young Lady Named Lou

A most forgetful young lady named Lou

Has a habit of losing a shoe.

My dear old wife

Is waving a knife,

And my dog he’s found Lou’s shoe …

There Once Was a Short Sighted Hairdresser

There once was a short sighted hairdresser

Who confessed to the great Father Confessor.

He said to her, “Bess,

It is right to confess.

But you are addressing my Welsh dresser!