Tag Archives: funny poetry

Forgetful Rose

I met a young lady named Rose

Who said, “I am fond of crows.

I left my perfume

In this changing room.”

I said, “it’s here with your clothes …!”.

The Poisoned Pen

When a young lady named Henrietta

Sent me a poisoned pen letter,

I said to Miss Gale,

“Hasn’t she heard of email?

Its much quicker than a letter!”.

The Vicar’s Bed

When a naughty young lady named White

Climbed into the vicar’s bed last night,

His sweet mistress Claire

Said to Miss Flair,

“Was it you who invited Miss White?”.

 

Gale and the Curtain Rail

There was a young lady named Gale

Who swung from the pub’s curtain rail.

When they said, “you are strange!”.

She said, “in yonder old grange,

We all swing and drink strong ale!”.

 

There Was a Young Man Named Giles

There was a young man named Giles

Who walked around wearing nothing but tiles.

When he fell with a crash,

All the tiles they went smash,

And the girls wore very big smiles …!

Gale the Blackmailer

There was a young lady named Gale

Who made all her money through blackmail.

When she blackmailed Lee

While out at sea

It ended in a large killer whale …

When a Young Lady Known as Hurd

When a young lady known as Hurd

Went and used a very bad word,

A vicar called Hocking

Said, “that is shocking!

But do cover me in lemon curd …”.

The Fine Old Bureau

There was a young lady named Flow

Who lived in a fine old bureau.

When they said, “what an antique!”,

She would awake from her sleep

And say, “no, I’m young Miss Flow!”.

When a Young Man Eating a Trifle

When a young man eating a trifle

Got shot by an old-fashioned rifle,

A policeman named Ted

Said, “he is dead!

Which is serious, and no mere trifle!””.

 

Miss Rose and My Bedclothes

When I found naughty Miss Rose

Sleeping nude under my new bedclothes,

I said, “my dear,

The bishop draws near,

You’d better stay under those bedclothes!”.