Tag Archives: funny poetry

The Dangers of Technology

When a young man, just for a laugh

Went and used his laptop in the bath,

There came a bang.

All the angels sang,

And he flew all the way to Bath!

Miss Lock’s Fetish

When a young lady named Miss Lock

Tied me to a very old clock,

And I said, “is this your fetish?”,

She whacked me with a large lettuce,

As for me, I said, “tick tock!”.

There Once Was a Nymph Named Echo

There once was a nymph named Echo

Who spent all her days drinking Prosecco.

When they said, “is that nice?”,

She would repeat their words twice,

And then she would drink more Prosecco!

Here Comes a Chopper to Chop Off my Head!

When a wicked young man named Ted

Said, “I shall chop off your head!”,

And his friend Max

Passed him an axe,

I found I was dreaming in bed!

Purely by Accident

When I accidentally entered a striptease bar

And got accosted by Pretty Miss Marr,

I said to Miss Coral,

“Are you girls quite moral?”,

As I returned that young lady’s bra …

Royal Mail

When a young lady wearing just socks

Jumped out from a red pillar box ,

And a postman named Marr

Said, “want to go far?”,

She said, “well, I’m wearing just socks …”.

 

Time for Bed

When a young lady dressed in red

Pulled me into a very large bed

I said to her, “Hop!

You and I should stop!

As the customers have turned bright red!”.

Banes and His Love of Drains

There once was a man named Banes

Who had a great obsession with drains.

Being small and  thin

He often fell in

Which caused Banes pains in those drains!

A Proposal of Marriage

I know a young lady named Honey

Who has found I’ve come into money.

She’s proposed to me

Along with Miss Lee,

But I can’t marry Lee and Honey!

Reinventing the Wheel

There once was a man named Neil

Who said, “I shall invent the wheel!”.

A young lady called Sun

Said, “that’s already been done!”,

As she rolled around with that Neil!