There was a young man named Guy
Who said, “in July I never lie.
But, come the August,
Then lie I must.
In truth, I’m a lying young guy!”.
In Truth I Lie
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Tag Archives: funny poetry
There Once Was A Man Who, Whilst Drinking
There once was a man who, whilst drinking
Slurred, “this here boatit is surely sinking”.
A young lady named Claire
Said, “sir, take great care!”,
And the seagulls they cried, “you are sinking!”.
When My Dog Found A Stocking
When my dog found a stocking
Belonging to beautiful young miss Hocking,
The vicar looked grim
And spoke of sin.
But the dog found nothing shocking!
—
When my dog found a stocking
Belonging to beautiful young miss Hocking,
The vicar looked grim
And spoke of sin.
And her boyfriend he came knocking!
When A Gorgeous Young Lady Named Frida
When a gorgeous young lady named Frida
Said, “I’d make a most excellent breeder!”.
I said, “lets have fun
In this hot summer sun.
But please, can we forget the breeder!”.
Whilst Declaiming My Poetry To A Crowd
Whilst declaiming my poetry to a crowd
In a town that’s known as Stroud,
A young lady dressed in white
Said, “sir, it’s long after midnight,
And your voice is far too loud!”.
Leigh Who Composed Poetry Whilst Climbing A Tree
There once was a young lady named Leigh
Who composed rhyming poetry whilst climbing a tree.
But her hands did slip
Causing a fractured right hip.
And a critic to praise Leigh’s fine poetry!
A Young Lady of Pleasure
I know a young lady of pleasure
Who says that her name is Heather.
She likes the sunshine
And drinking red wine.
Tell me, is her name really Heather?
In May
When a young lady said, “come May
All young lovers they dance and play”.
I said, “my dear,
The Autumn draws near.
And my hair has turned quite grey!”.
Leigh Who Needed Money
When a young lady named Leigh
Said, “I’ll be honest with thee.
My sweet darling honey
I need some money”.
I said, “go ask a bee!”.
Fly
Fly, you are one of god’s creatures tis true, but must you plague me the whole day through? Must you make that buzzing sound? That infernal noise doth my thoughts drown! Take my advice and go away, before I reach for the fly spray!
K Morris - Poet 