Tag Archives: blogging

Corporate Types

Corporate types programme their likes

Into computers,

Where they are heard

By commuters

And a middle-aged poet

Who romanticises vinyl,

And exchanges a final word

With the barmaid,

Who doesn’t remember vinyl.

 

 

A Careless Young Lady Named Mar

A careless young lady named Mar

Is known for losing her bra.

While her friend Coral

Is really quite moral

Though I’ve sometimes found her bra …

I Forget the Last Time

I forget the last time.

But often look

In dusty books

And find pleasure in rhyme.

 

 

I still feed my need

With verse from volumes

Full of musty scent.

 

 

But there is another perfume

Of which I sometimes repent

Alibi

A man whose name was Wood

Said my poetry was no good.

In the forest dark

His end was stark.

But my alibi it was good …

Decorum

I know a young lady named Rose

Who walks around whilst wearing no clothes.

But when we go shopping

She does wear 1 stocking.

Which I think shows decorum by Rose!

Chancer

I awoke with a gorgeous lap dancer

Who said, “sir, you are a chancer!”.

I said, “dear Miss Follit

Have you seen my wallet?”.

She said, “sir, I’m also a chancer!”.

A Brutal Young Man Named Keith

A brutal young man named Keith

Threatened to knock out my teeth.

But I produced my faithful knuckleduster,

Which got him in a fluster,

Now Keith is wearing false teeth …!

Squire Pleasant

My uncle, the good natured Squire Pleasant

Invited me to go and shoot peasant.

I went with my spouse

And found peasants and grouse,

And the police who arrested Squire Pleasant!

I Have Awoken to an Empty Bed

I have awoken to an empty bed

And recollections of past sinning

With women.

 

 

I have felt spiritually dead

And fought to forget regret

In bed.

 

 

But, for a long time

I have engaged

Only in rhyme.

 

When I leave the stage

Only my rhyme may remain.

For there is no pain when dead.