There once was a terrible old lecher
Who went by the name of Fletcher.
A girl called Kate
Used a heavy plate,
Which ended that old lecher named Fletcher!
There Once Was a Terrible Old Lecher
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Tag Archives: nonsense verse
Mark Who is Extremely Fond of the Park
I know a young man named Mark
Who is extremely fond of the park,
Where Claire and Miss Rose
Remove all of their clothes.
Or so I am told by Mark …!
A Gorgeous Young Lady Known as Katie
A gorgeous young lady known as Katie
Has a reputation for being real matey
With well heeled gentlemen,
(Well, so says Ken).
And Ken’s wallet is really quite weighty …!
Miss Bland Who Was Fond of the One Night Stand
There once was a young lady named Bland
Who was fond of the one night stand.
With a man called White
She stood there all night,
Watching the great tide sweep over the sand …!
Wet Yvette
There was a young lady named Yvette
Who was known as a Tory wet.
She opposed all cuts
And swam in waterbutts,
Which made that Tory really quite wet!
(The term “Tory wet” was used during the administrations of the late Lady Thatcher to describe those on the left of the Conservative party, whilst those on the right where labelled as “dry”. The term more commonly employed today to designate those on the left of the party is “one-nation” Tories or Conservatives).
When I Found Pretty Miss Lin
When I found pretty miss Lin
Lurking in my brand new bin,
I did shout,
“You! Get out!”,
But Lin she dragged me in …!
Claire Who Was Eaten by a Rather Large Brown Bear
When a young lady whose name was Claire
Got eaten by a rather large brown bear,
Her poor boyfriend Guy
Said, with a sigh,
“I guess that’s the end of our affair …”.
Murry’s Hot Curry
There was a young man named Murry
Who fell into a very hot curry.
When they said, “are you okay!”.
He said, “it’s a cold day!
But I’m hot here in this curry!”.
As the Season of Halloween Rapidly Approaches
As the season of Halloween rapidly approaches
I meet many young women wearing cockroaches.
When I ask, “are you a witch?”,
They say, “no, we are very rich!
Don’t you know its expensive wearing cockroaches!”.
Miss Glover
I met a young lady named Glover
Who asked could she be my lover.
She said, just for me
She’d throw in Miss Leigh,
Which delighted that young lady’s dear mother!
K Morris - Poet 