When a wicked young man named Ted
Said, “I shall chop off your head!”,
And his friend Max
Passed him an axe,
I found I was dreaming in bed!
Here Comes a Chopper to Chop Off my Head!
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Tag Archives: nonsense verse
Simulation
When I met a philosopher of this nation
Who said, “we’re all living in a simulation”.
I gave him a big kick
And whacked him with a stick,
Which was fine as we’re in a simulation!
The Joys of Being a Pig
There was a young lady named Pam
Who liked to gorge on boiled ham.
When they said, “you’re a pig!”,
She would chew on her wig
As she rolled in marmalade and jam!
Royal Mail
When a young lady wearing just socks
Jumped out from a red pillar box ,
And a postman named Marr
Said, “want to go far?”,
She said, “well, I’m wearing just socks …”.
Time for Bed
When a young lady dressed in red
Pulled me into a very large bed
I said to her, “Hop!
You and I should stop!
As the customers have turned bright red!”.
Banes and His Love of Drains
There once was a man named Banes
Who had a great obsession with drains.
Being small and thin
He often fell in
Which caused Banes pains in those drains!
A Proposal of Marriage
I know a young lady named Honey
Who has found I’ve come into money.
She’s proposed to me
Along with Miss Lee,
But I can’t marry Lee and Honey!
Reinventing the Wheel
There once was a man named Neil
Who said, “I shall invent the wheel!”.
A young lady called Sun
Said, “that’s already been done!”,
As she rolled around with that Neil!
Musical Head
There once was a girl in red
Who liked to stand on her head.
When they asked her why
She would wink 1 eye
And play the drums with her head!
Brevity
I once met a lawyer in Crown Court
Who said, “your poem is unfinished and short …”.
K Morris - Poet 