I met a vampire on Halloween
Who said, “why don’t you scream!”
I said to Lake,
“Pass me that stake”,
Which caused that vampire to scream!”
Halloween Vampire
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Tag Archives: nonsense
When a Young Man Named Rimmer
When a young man named Rimmer
Borrowed his girlfriend’s brand new strimmer
To trim his beard,
She found it weird,
As he owned a beard trimmer!
Rose
When a young lady whose name is Rose
Said, “your views I shall oppose!”,
And I replied, “but you don’t know my view!”,
She said, “that’s perfectly true,
But I really don’t like your clothes!”.
—
When a young lady whose name is Rose
Jumped up and down on my toes,
And I said, “that really does hurt!”,
She tore off my shirt.
As to why? only Rose knows.
—
There was a young lady named Rose
Who composed a poem all about toes.
When they said, “its incomplete
As there aren’t any feet”,
She hit them right on the nose!
On Going To Bed Last Night
On going to bed last night
I met a young lady named White.
I admired her see through nightdress,
But she asked me to stress
That nothing happened last night . . .
When A Young Lady Whose Name Is White
When a young lady whose name is White
Got into a bit of a fight
Over her missing left shoe,
With a girl called Lou,
I went and hid her right!
—
When a young lady whose name is White
Got into a bit of a fight
With a girl called Lou,
Over her missing left shoe,
I wished them both “good night!”.
—
When a young lady whose name is White
Said, “I like Wuthering Height”,
And I asked, “do you mean Heights?”
She took off her tights
And said, “lets not discuss literature tonight!”.
There Once Was A Wasp With No Sting
There once was a wasp with no sting
Who said, “life is a most unfair thing,
As when I attack
They always come back”,
And he wept at the lack of a sting.
I Know A Young Lady Named Bland
I know a young lady named Bland
Who is fond of the handstand,
But her dress being short
I think that I ought
To warn that young lady Bland!
When A Young Man Named Ed
When a young man named Ed
Read a poem about women and bed,
A few fell asleep
Whilst others did weep,
And the bishop shook his great head.
When A Young Lady Whose Name Is Jane
When a young lady whose name is Jane
Said, “there is much pleasure in pain.
I shall go first
For better or worse,
I said, “just board the blooming train!”.
When A Young Lady Named Ria
When a young lady whose name is Ria
Wore a dress both short and sheer,
A cyclist called Mike
Fell off his bike,
And they married the very next year.
K Morris - Poet 