When a young lady named Rose
Said, “as for me, anything goes!”.
I said, “that’s great!”,
Then, me and Kate
Tweaked that big nose of Rose!
Rose for Whom Anything Goes
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Tag Archives: humour
There Was a Young Lady Named Fay
There was a young lady named Fay,
Who they say came from the USA.
She was a Confederate bride
But history’s great rolling tide
Has swept Fay and the Confederacy away.
(I am currently reading Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell. For anyone who is unaware of the plot of the novel, it deals with the American Civil War and its impact on the Confederate states of America, both during and after the war. Hence I thought it would be interesting to compose a limerick about those times).
There Once Was a Poor Rhymer Named Gus
There once was a poor rhymer named Gus
Who, on becoming overwhelmed with wickedness and lust,
Entered a house of ill repute
Where he played upon his flute.
As the girls sang, “poetry, ‘tis but dust!”.
Kate’s Date
There once was a traffic warden named Kate
Who decided to go out on a date.
When her date Lyme
Was not on time,
She fined him for being 1 minute late!
Bess’s Confession
When a young lady named Bess
Said, “I must my sins confess!”.
I said, “please cease!
I’m not a priest!
And put back on your dress!”.
Claire and Rose
When a young lady named Claire
Suggested we all have an affair
And she and Rose
Took off their clothes.
I awoke right then and there.
Pearl
There once was a young lady named Pearl
Whose reputation made the poor bishop’s hair curl.
I often used to go
To a place called Soho
To enjoy tea and cakes with that girl …
Louise and Her Fleas
There was a young lady named Louise
Who was extremely fond of pet fleas.
Her boyfriend called Hogg
Owned a large dog,
Where Louise kept all her pet fleas!
Knocking
On awaking to a very loud knocking
I turned to the beautiful Miss Hocking
And said, “’tis time
To indulge in rhyme.
And why is your boyfriend loudly knocking?”
The Brotherhood of Man
When a religious old lady named Miss Ann
Announced her belief in the brotherhood of man.
I thought her real sweet
And asked for some meat.
But I was not the brother of Ann …
K Morris - Poet 