Tag Archives: humorous verse

When I Visited a Discreet Little Sauna

When I visited a discreet little Sauna
I was entertained by pretty Miss Lorna.
We enjoyed tea and cake
With a girl called Lake,
And a vicar who calls himself Warner …

I Met a Young Lady Named Steed

I met a young lady named Steed
Who said, “I have a great need!”,
Dear reader, I must confess
She was wearing no dress
Which distracted my steed from his feed!

Miss Mar’s Memoir

My friend whose name is Miss Mar
Wrote a memoir just wearing her bra.
When I attended her book signing
All the men they where lining
Up to see her memoir and bra …

The Ghost of Marx

Whilst walking through some very nice parks
I met with the ghost of Marx.
He said, “be my pal
And read my Das Kapital”.
But I preferred to enjoy those parks!

Pure Miss Moore

I know a young lady named Moore
Who has a reputation for being pure.
She came round at midnight
With her friend Miss White,
Who’s reputation is as pure as Moore …

Lou Who Fell into a Pot of Stew

When a young lady named Lou
Fell into a pot of stew,
A chef called Doyle
Said, “you will spoil
That stew you fell into Lou!”.

A Wicked Rumour

I know a pretty young perfumer
Who is spreading a wicked rumour,
About me and her,
And gorgeous Miss Claire.
How sad its just a rumour …!

When a Young Lady Who Comes from Dover

When a young lady who comes from Dover
Said, “I want you to bend right over”,
A man named Frank
Said, “do you spank?”,
She said, “just pick up my dropped pullover!”.

When a Young Lady Playing at Dice

When a young lady playing at dice
Said, “do join me in my vice!”,
I said, “my dear Rose,
You are wearing no clothes!
Which is distracting me from my dice!”.

If I Won the Lottery

If I won the lottery
No doubt I would find,
At the age of 53,
Young women chasing me,
For my great mind
And my fine poetry.

And I would enjoy the charms
Of many a young woman’s arms.
But, strange to say
When all my pay
Had gone away, they would say,
“We have no interest in thee,
And your poor poetry …!”.