As I walked down a dark street
I met a thief with big feet.
When he said, “stand and deliver!”,
I distracted him with hot liver,
And then I stamped on his feet!
Stand and Deliver!
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Tag Archives: humorous verse
Miss Follett and Alice
As I strolled through London’s Crystal Palace
I met a young lady named Alice.
She and Miss Follett
Have borrowed my wallet.
Has anyone seen that Follett or Alice?
When a Morbid Young Man Named White
When a morbid young man named White
Said, “I may die this very night!”.
I said, “I’ll have your lover
The beautiful and talented Miss Glover”
White said, “yes, that is perfectly alright!”
Mole Who was Fond of Eating Coal
There once was a man named Mole
Who had a liking for eating coal.
A jolly old squire
Lit a great fire
Which quickly burned Mole and his coal!
Wicked Miss Follett
A wicked young lady known as Follett
Has relieved many men of their wallet.
But me, being pure
I am perfectly sure
That my wallet is safe from Follett …!
—
A wicked young lady known as Follett
Has relieved many men of their wallet.
I hide mine behind the curtain
With a girl called Miss Person,
Where its perfectly safe from Miss Follett …!
A Gossipy Young Lady Known as Nell
A gossipy young lady known as Nell
Likes to claim she knows me well.
I remember Miss Jane
With her mean cane,
But I really don’t remember that Nell!
My Visit to Gloucester
When a young lady named Miss Foster
Said, “sir, come with me to Gloucester.
Me and my girlfriend
Want a dirty weekend!”,
It ended with hot coffee in Costa!
I Found a Sock
I found a sock
Too small to be mine.
Perhaps, after wine
Some lover of mine
Forgot her sock. But what
Do lovers do
When missing 1 sock?
Do they wear 1 shoe?
Politics and Beer
When a beer loving Socialist named Grub
Went and entered a prestigious Conservative club,
And they said, “why are you here!”,
He said, “I came here for beer,
As the beer here is very good!”.
Debauch
Following a night of great drunkenness and debauch
I found a young lady on my porch.
Her name it was Lou
And she’d lost a shoe.
I wonder, was she part of my debauch?
K Morris - Poet 