When an elderly gentleman named Jack
Said, “let that whip go crack!”,
A young lady called Pearl
Said, “I’m a gentle girl.
Wouldn’t you prefer a little smack!”.
Let That Whip Go Crack!
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Tag Archives: funny poetry
A Young Lady Who Dresses in Pink
A young lady who dresses in pink
Is known for her most peculiar kink.
Her name is Miss Hocking
And she’s really quite shocking,
So I always give her a wink!
When a Young Lady Drinking Strong Booze
When a young lady drinking strong booze
Lost more than her stockings and shoes,
Priggish Miss Coral
Called her immoral.
And I returned those stockings and shoes …
Grub
When an elderly gentleman named Grub
Went and died in a gastropub,
A chef called Miss Lou
Put him in a stew
And served him up as grub!
Miss Doyle
I met a young lady named Doyle
Who knows how to use massage oil.
She came round to my place
With her pretty friend Miss Grace
To discuss the interesting subject of soil!
When An Adventurous Young Lady Wearing Heels
When an adventurous young lady wearing heels
Jumped in to swim with the seals
They said to her, “Lin,
To swim is no sin,
But why are you wearing those heels!”.
Making Music
A young lady of ill repute
Is fond of playing the flute.
Her friend Lin
Plays my violin.
And me? I play the lute!
Claire’s Warning to Gentlemen
When a young lady named Claire
Said, “you gentlemen should take care
As there are many young women
To tempt you all into sinning”,
I remembered last night with her …
My Friend Who is High in Society
My friend who is high in society
Said, “Kevin, I am fond of variety.
That pretty Miss Lou
Goes well with Sue!”.
I said, “there’s some merit in sobriety!”.
Miss Moon
As I entered my fine old bedroom
I met a young lady named Moon.
I said, “my dear,
What brings you here?”.
She said, “you’re smoking a magic mushroom!”.
K Morris - Poet 