In the depths of the churchyard dark
I met with a vampire named Mark.
When he went for my blood
With my great stake of wood
I ended that vampire in the dark!
In the Depths of the Churchyard Dark
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Tag Archives: funny poetry
When a Young Lady Said, with a Curse
When a young lady said, with a curse,
Do stop including me in your risqué verse!”.
I said to her, “dear Lou,
Stop spanking me with your shoe!”,
Which caused that girl to curse even worse!
Flow
I know a young lady named Flow.
Her husband he left some time ago.
We laugh and drink
And sometimes I think,
On that strange lump in Flow’s patio …
There Once Was a Young Person of Woking
There once was a young person of Woking
Who had a very bad habit of poking,
Until they poked an old man
Who said, “I’ve got a plan,
To kick you around the town of Woking!”.
Lyme Who Taught His Dog How to Rhyme
There once was a poet named Lyme
Who taught his dog how to rhyme.
In the depths of dark
He would howl and bark
And his dog would recite a rhyme.
Seals and High-Heels
A young lady who wore only high-heels
Had a fondness for swimming with seals.
An old vicar called Glass
Said, “we are but grass.
But I’m fond of seals and high-heels!”
The Beauty of Dawn
There was a young lady named Dawn
Who danced nude on the vicarage lawn.
The vicar’s wife Hocking
Found it most shocking
And the vicar he studied Dawn’s form.
Gale and the Whale
There once was a girl named Gale
Who got swallowed by a large whale.
But her heels being sharp
He said, “for my part,
I wish I had swallowed a snail!”
The Latest Fashion
Awaking after a night of passion
With a young lady of fashion,
I said to her, “Lou!
We’ve been sleeping in glue!”
She said, “it’s the latest fashion!”
Bianca
There was a young lady named Bianca
Who said all people should thank her.
But her conversation was boring
And had them all snoring,
So nobody heard that young lady Bianca!
K Morris - Poet 