There once was an old squire named Ray
Who liked to go shooting all day.
His handsome butler called Morgan
Was good on the organ,
And the squire’s wife she loved to play!
Squire Ray
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Tag Archives: funny poetry
Lost Bras
I know a young lady named Marr
Who is always losing her bra.
She is known to be sporty
And I’ve heard that she’s naughty
And the vicar he’s wearing a bra …!
On Being Stung by a Large Bumblebee
On being stung by a large Bumblebee
On a part you will never see!
I jumped in the water
With the vicar’s pretty daughter,
Who was nude as nude can be!
What a Caper!
When a young lady named Jane
Finished making love on a train,
An old man dropped his paper
And said, “Jane! What a caper!
Please can I see that again!”
See-Through
I met a young lady of Munich
Who said, “do you like my see-through tunic?”.
I said to her, “Rose!
You are wearing no clothes!”.
She said, “we dress like that in Munich!”.
In the Depths of the Churchyard Dark
In the depths of the churchyard dark
I met with a vampire named Mark.
When he went for my blood
With my great stake of wood
I ended that vampire in the dark!
When a Young Lady Said, with a Curse
When a young lady said, with a curse,
Do stop including me in your risqué verse!”.
I said to her, “dear Lou,
Stop spanking me with your shoe!”,
Which caused that girl to curse even worse!
Flow
I know a young lady named Flow.
Her husband he left some time ago.
We laugh and drink
And sometimes I think,
On that strange lump in Flow’s patio …
There Once Was a Young Person of Woking
There once was a young person of Woking
Who had a very bad habit of poking,
Until they poked an old man
Who said, “I’ve got a plan,
To kick you around the town of Woking!”.
Lyme Who Taught His Dog How to Rhyme
There once was a poet named Lyme
Who taught his dog how to rhyme.
In the depths of dark
He would howl and bark
And his dog would recite a rhyme.
