When I saw the good vicar Large
Making love to young women on a barge,
I just couldn’t stop grinning
And spoke of his sinning!
He said, “you’re paid to steer this barge!”
Vicar Large and the Barge
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Tag Archives: funny poetry
When I Met the Devil in a Pub
When I met the devil in a pub
I said, “have you come in for grub?”
He said, “the barmaid is pretty
And you sir are most witty!
But alas! This pub it has no grub!
My Sugar Date with Kate
I once went on a sugar date
With a young lady named Miss Kate.
When it came to paying time
I recited a very fine rhyme
Which delighted the old waiter and Kate!
No Soul
There once was a young man named Mole
Who said, “I believe you have no soul!”
An old person called Neville
Said “I’m not the devil!”
And his eyes they blazed like hot coal …!
Red
When a young lady in red
Invited me to come to bed
I said, “dear Miss Moore!
This is a furniture store!
And the manager has turned red!”
Cerebral
A young lady who is really most cerebral
Said, “your poetry it is so very terrible!”
I said to her, Jane,
You have a great brain,
But your manners they are really most terrible!”
Goth
When I met a beautiful young Goth
Who was suffering from a bad cough,
I felt such bliss
When we two kissed.
But that Goth gave me her cough!
Celebrity
A celebrity who appears on my TV
Is looking for a date with me.
Her name is Miss Spink
And I’ve seen her wink,
And I know that winks for me!
Reading in Bed
When I met a young lady in red
Who said, “do you read when in bed?”,
I said, “dear Miss Ling
Do you fancy a fling?”,
She said, “I only read in my bed!”
Careless Miss White
A careless young lady named Miss White
Often falls in the street at night.
A kindly vicar called Paul
Said, “many young women fall”,
As he picked her up last night …!
K Morris - Poet 