Tag Archives: funny poems

Dodgy Geezer

I met a young lady Named Louisa

Who said, “you are a dodgy geezer!”

I said, “I’m not dodgy,

But perhaps a little podgy!”,

Which tickled that young lady named Louisa!

 

Aphrodite’s Nightie

My girlfriend whose name is Aphrodite

Went and bought a see-through nightie.

Her friend Miss Echo

Is fond of Prosecco –

And the vicar has her nightie …

Dom

Have you heard of a dominatrix named Nicks

Who is known for her love of sticks?

If you ask how I know,

I heard it from Vicar Joe;

Who is known for his love of sticks …

Dodgy

Whilst browsing a dodgy website

I encountered a young lady named White.

She came round to mine

And after much wine

I kissed that young lady good night …

Poetic Muse

When a young lady wearing just shoes

Said, “I want to be your poetic muse!”

I said to her, “Rose!

You are wearing no clothes!”

She said, “that’s how you like your muse …!”

 

Philosophical Holly

A philosophical young lady named Holly

Owns an old and interesting folly.

I’ve talked of philosophy

With pretty Miss Lee –

But now lets discuss Holly’s folly …

Table Dancing

I know a young lady named Spink

Who is extremely fond of a drink.

Her and Miss Mabel

Dance on the table

When we gentlemen buy them a drink …

 

When I Met the Devil in a Pub

When I met the devil in a pub

I said, “have you come in for grub?”

He said, “the barmaid is pretty

And you sir are most witty!

But alas! This pub it has no grub!

Red

When a young lady in red

Invited me to come to bed

I said, “dear Miss Moore!

This is a furniture store!

And the manager has turned red!”

My Literary Estate

I am marrying a young lady named Kate

Who will inherit all of my literary estate.

She says, “writers have money”,

Which I find really funny –

As she’ll inherit all of my literary estate …