I know a young lady named Spink
Who is extremely fond of a drink.
Her and Miss Mabel
Dance on the table
When we gentlemen buy them a drink …
Table Dancing
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Tag Archives: funny poems
When I Met the Devil in a Pub
When I met the devil in a pub
I said, “have you come in for grub?”
He said, “the barmaid is pretty
And you sir are most witty!
But alas! This pub it has no grub!
Red
When a young lady in red
Invited me to come to bed
I said, “dear Miss Moore!
This is a furniture store!
And the manager has turned red!”
My Literary Estate
I am marrying a young lady named Kate
Who will inherit all of my literary estate.
She says, “writers have money”,
Which I find really funny –
As she’ll inherit all of my literary estate …
Jacinta’s Splinter
When a young lady named Jacinta
Went and trod on a splinter,
She hopped all around
And said something profound.
And then she cursed that splinter!
The Man Who Liked to Eat Chalk
A man who liked to eat chalk
Said that it helped him to talk.
One day, feeling bored,
He swallowed a blackboard.
Which worked very well with that chalk!
Miss Fox and the Telephone Box
There once was a young lady called Miss Fox
Who placed lots of ads in a phone box.
An elderly vicar named Glyn
Spoke of wickedness and sin
As he called Miss Fox from that telephone box …!
Too Much Latin
There once was a great lover of Latin
Who had a job as a professional assassin.
Whilst reading great Virgil
He became very ill.
That’s what comes of reading too much Latin!
Gorgeous Miss Unity
The gorgeous and very talented Miss Unity
Is well known in the poetry community.
She reads her verse nude,
Which many find quite rude!
And then I go home with Unity …!
Midnight Poetry
As I sat reciting poetry at midnight
I spied a young lady dressed in white.
When I said, “are you a ghost!”,
She said, “no! I’m your host!
And your poetry woke me up at midnight!”
K Morris - Poet 