There was a young lady called Sadie
With a past more than a little shady.
I said “Let us marry
And no longer tarry”.
She made reply
With a scornful sigh
“I would rather die
Than to your arms fly.
Besides, I long ago did marry
A man named Barry
And I am married still
To your best friend Bill”!
Happy Christmas to all my followers. I wish you all a peaceful festive season and much joy for the coming year.
The below poem was, needless to say written with my tongue firmly in my cheek and should not be taken seriously. I in no manner whatsoever condone animal cruelty.
—
I shall sit upon a chocolate log
As I stuff my faithful dog.
I shall the turkey walk
As my thought
Revolves around
A question most profound
Where should I the stuffing put
As regards my loyal mut!
He tried to make his verse rhyme
But it became worser and worser.
‘Twas perverse
To see
Dog rhyme with tree.
He cudgelled his brains to produce poetry fine
And was convinced beer rhymes with wine.
Inspiration from the great poets he took
And was certain Emily Dickinson
Was Brontae’s sister
And Heathcliff could not resist her.
Finally from the top of Wuthering Heights
He jumped
Hitting the moors with a plop
But his bad poems
Just would not halt.
It was his very great fault
He did not decease
And leave his readers in tranquillity!
The squire’s desire,
Sets the housemaid on fire.
Her father,
Gets in a lather.
While the carpenter Able,
Builds a cradle.
Oh young ladies, beware the dangers of waiting at table!
An angel dressed in white
appeared to him at night.
filled the dark hours with delight
then came the morning light
she vanished in a trice
A Gentleman Suitor To His Beloved
—
“My darling, let us sit down upon the grass.
Though the firmament fall, my love for thee tis sure to last.
Other men may betray, but my heart is steadfast.
Let us be quick my sweet, for I must dash”.
—
The Lady’s Response To Her Suitor
—
“Sweetheart, the ground is wet and cold,
To recline upon it would quite ruin my clothes.
The heavens show no sign of falling,
Besides, I hear mama calling”.
The man a mermaid caught.
Together they did cavort.
Their love was dearly bought.
It ended up in court
Fly, you are one of god’s creatures tis true, but must you plague me the whole day through? Must you make that buzzing sound? That infernal noise doth my thoughts drown! Take my advice and go away, before I reach for the fly spray!
Where they one of a kind?
Did they in romance combine?
Did they dance through the night by the moonlight?
Did the stars up above shine down on their love?
Was it joy they did find?
Who knows, she left her shoes behind.
Spice is nice and rhymes with vice, but is it nice? The device of vice adds spice to life, but is it nice? Strife rhymes with vice which isn’t nice? Life, strife vice, how very nice.
K Morris - Poet 