When my dog friend said to me,
“You are barking up the wrong tree!”,
I said to him, “Mark,
I am unable to bark!
And you can not climb that tree!”
Barking Up the Wrong Tree
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Tag Archives: nonsense verse
A Young Lady of Malta
I know a young lady of Malta
And no-one is able to fault her.
But back at mine
She crosses a line –
But nobody knows that in Malta …!
The Naughty Nymph
I’ve just met a very naughty nymph
Who winked at me from a plinth.
Her name is Miss Follett
And she has my wallet!
Dear reader! Have you seen that nymph!
Gwen and her Pen
There once was a student named Gwen
Who was fond of throwing her pen.
A teacher called Lou
Said, “that won’t do!”,
And threw that pen back at Gwen!
Lost Shoes
A young lady who is fond of booze
Lost her stiletto shoes in the river Ouse.
Now a naughty nun
Wears them for fun –
We met on a round the world cruise!
Perm
I met a man with a perm
Who called me a worthless worm.
I grabbed sharp sheers
And despite his tears
I cut off that worthless perm!
Matt’s Cat
When a young man known as Matt
Went and bought a very large cat,
An elderly person called Brian
Yelled something about a lion!
And that was the end of that!
Whilst Engrossed in Wuthering Heights
Whilst engrossed in Wuthering Heights
I saw a young lady in tights.
I said to her, “Rose!
You are wearing no clothes!”,
She said, “no! I am wearing some tights!”
Ron and the Scone
There once was a man named Ron
Who liked to go on and on!
A girl called Lin
Said, “forgive my sin!”,
As she brained Ron with a scone!
(The word “scone” is often pronounced as “scon” depending on which part of the UK one comes from).
Whilst Walking Through a very Dark Park
Whilst walking through a very dark park
I met with a vampire named Mark.
When I began to pray
He said, “it’s a play!”,
But the werewolves howled in that park …!
K Morris - Poet 