Tag Archives: nonsense verse

The Dissolute Young Man and His Lute

There once was a man most dissolute

Who liked to play on his lute.

When the young women came round

You would hear a sweet sound

As he skillfully played on his lute!

Leigh Who Has Composed a Poem All About Me

A young lady whose name is Leigh

Has composed a poem all about me.

Her verse is so bad

That its driven critics mad,

And now they are all blaming me …!

Lou Who Wore 1 Sock and 1 Shoe

There was a young lady named Lou

Who wore 1 sock and one shoe.

On the other foot

She carefully put

A clock which matched with Lou’s shoe!

There Once Was a Police Constable Named Rose

There once was a police constable named Rose

Who was well known for wearing plain clothes.

A man called Matt

Wore only his hat,

And got arrested by Rose in plain clothes …!

Wet Through

When a young lady named Lou

Said, “we are all wet through!”,

Lou and Miss Rose

Took off their clothes,

Then the vicar he married those two!

Being Known

As I strolled through the great Crystal Palace

I met with a young lady named Alice.

When she gave me a wink

And said, “me and Miss Spink?”,

I said, “I’m known here in Crystal Palace …!.

Keith the Thief

There was a young man named Keith

Who was known as a prodigious thief,

Until Miss Rose and Miss Hocking

Tied him up with their stockings,

Which delighted that young man named Keith!

 

 

There was a young man named Keith

Who was known as a prodigious thief,

Until Miss Rose and Miss Hocking

Tied him up with their stockings,

Which caused that thief Keith to cease!

My Famous Old School

I once attended a famous old school

Which was haunted by a wicked ghoul.

When the headmaster did shout,

“You! ghoul! Please get out!”,

He called him a blithering old fool!

Whilst Attending a Famous Old Boarding School

Whilst attending a famous old boarding school

I met with a complaining young ghoul.

He said, “its too warm

In this stuffy old dorm!”.

So I chucked him in the pool!

 

There Once Was a Terrible Old Lecher

There once was a terrible old lecher

Who went by the name of Fletcher.

A girl called Kate

Used a heavy plate,

Which ended that old lecher named Fletcher!