Tag Archives: nonsense verse

When My Girlfriend, the Beautiful Miss Lou

When my girlfriend, the beautiful Miss Lou
Said, “there’s a wicked side to you!”.
Our housemate Miss White
Turned out the light,
And said, “may I join you 2?”

A Young Lady with Plenty of Money

A young lady with plenty of money
Calls me her sweet and her honey.
Her name it is Jane
And she’s so very plain.
But, dear reader, she’s loaded with money …!

When a Young Lady Sitting On a Box

When a young lady sitting on a box
Said, “sir, you are a sly old fox!”
I replied, “dear Lin
I’ve committed no sin.
It’s his lordship whose been wearing your frocks!”

When a Young Lady Who Comes From Burton

When a young lady who comes from Burton
Came round and swung from my bedroom curtain,
And I said, “don’t fall!”
My cynical old friend Paul
Said, “she fell long ago swinging in Burton!”

Whilst Dancing On My Most Favourite Bar

Whilst dancing on my most favourite bar
I was joined by barmaid Miss Marr.
All the glasses went flying
And old ladies started crying.
And they still haven’t found that bra!

Old Mother Hubbard for Today

Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
To get her poor doggy a bone.
But when she got there
She found Miss Claire,
Keeping company with the good vicar Bone!

There Once Was a Girl Named Louise

There once was a girl named Louise
Who was famous for sailing the seas.
She cooked a bad man
In her large frying pan.
And the pirates all deserted the seas!

Vampire Humour

I’m dating a pretty vampire named Wood
Who is rather fond of men’s blood.
But she also likes wine,
Which suits me real fine.
As I’m rather fond of my blood!

Wong’s Gong

There was a young lady named Wong
Who liked to bong on her gong.
When the vicar comes for tea
She invariably sits on my knee.
But now lets return to Wong’s gong!

I know a young lady named Wong
Who likes to bong on her gong.
When the vicar comes for tea
She invariably sits on my knee,
And Wong she bongs on her gong!

There Was a Young Lady of Hull

There was a young lady of Hull
Who, on being chased by a bull
Leapt into a great lake,
Where she encountered a rake.
So she returned forthwith to that bull!