When a young lady of Streatham
Did me with blackmail threaten,
I smiled with sweetness at her
And said, “I don’t know Claire,
And I’ve never been to Streatham!”.
When A Young Lady of Streatham
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Tag Archives: humour
When A Young Lady Whose Name Is Lou
When a young lady named Lou
Spanked me with her high-heel shoe,
And I said, “give me more!”,
She replied, “I hear the front door.
Its the bishop, he’s due at 2!”.
When A Politician Named Matt
When a politician named Matt
Maintained he never said that,
And they showed him the proof
He said, “I always tell the truth,
And the earth ’tis undoubtedly flat!”.
When A Young Lady Whose Name Is Fay
When a young lady whose name is Fay
Wore a short dress one hot summer’s day,
A vicar called Heart,
Who loved his art
Said, “Fay, would you model for me today?”
When A Young Lady Whose Name Is Kate
When a young lady whose name is Kate
Invited me out on a hot curry date,
I enjoyed lots of spice,
Which was more than nice,
But that’s enough about that young lady Kate!
My Time On Stage
A leading actress whose name is Claire
Said, “I will see you out there”.
So I went on stage
With a performer called Page,
But there was no sign of Claire!
There Once Was A Man Who Ate Glue
There once was a man who ate glue,
Which was a very strange thing to do!
When they asked, “is it nice?”
He tried to speak twice,
But he was unable, due to the glue!
Lin and the Biscuit Tin
When a young lady named Lin
Jumped out of my biscuit tin,
And I said, with a glare,
“What were you doing in there?”,
She said, “you shut me in!”.
—
When a young lady whose name is Lin
Jumped out of my biscuit tin
She said, with a pearcing glare,
“There are no biscuits in there,
And I have grown sad and thin!”.
The Establishment
When a young man whose name is Franks
Said, “the establishment they always close ranks!”.
And I replied, “how so?”,
He said, “get off my big toe!
You’re the establishment, and you always close ranks!”.
My Friend Whose Name Is Louise
My friend whose name is Louise
Is extremely fond of high trees.
When she reaches the top
She likes to play pop,
Which always attracts the bees!
K Morris - Poet 