Tag Archives: funny poetry

After a Night of Delight with Miss White

After a night of delight with Miss White

We got caught by my wife Mrs Right.

She comes from Bristol

And packs a pistol –

We ducked as she shot out the light!

There Once Was an Old Man in a Shroud

There once was an old  man in a shroud

Who said, “this music is far too loud!”.

They said to him, “Ted!

We thought you where dead!”.

He said, “yes! And  this music is too loud!”.

Magyar

When a young lady wearing no bra

Said, “do you know I’m a Magyar?”,

And I said, “so you are Hungary?”,

She replied, “no, I’ve just had tea!

But I just can’t find my bra!”

My Midnight Stroll

As I strolled home at just after midnight

I met a young lady under a street light.

We spent our time

In discussing fine rhyme,

As I explained to a police constable that night …!

Miss Hopp Who Liked to Drink Pop

There was a young lady named Hopp

Who was extremely fond of drinking pop.

One day she tried beer

Which made her feel queer.

So henceforth she drank nothing but pop!

Lee Who Wrote an Obituary of Me

There once was a man known as Lee

Who went and wrote an obituary of me.

I am still alive

And continue to thrive.

But that Lee he drowned out at sea!

Pigeon Pie

I know a young man named Guy

Who has a fondness for pigeon pie.

I hear from Fay

That he’s flown away.

Fay and I, we blame the pie!

The Charms of a Young Woman’s Arms

When rich old men

Are seen with young women on their arm,

I must condemn them

For tempting such women into lives of sinning

As for the charms

Of girl’s arms? I can not afford them …!
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Copyright: Kevin Morris.

The Vegan Vampire

I met a young lady named Moriah

Who said, “I am a Vegan vampire!.

I never drink blood,

But fruit is good!”.

She’s a very funny girl is Moriah!
.

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

Light Fingered Jim

A thief who was tall and slim

Had the nickname of light fingered Jim

Until a girl called Pat

Set a cunning trap

Which did for that light fingered Jim!

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Copyright: Kevin Morris.