Tag Archives: funny poems

Fast and Furious

When a young lady who is really curious
Said, “I like to go fast and furious!”.
Me and Miss Stride
Had a great ride.
But her boyfriend he was more than furious!

The Pink Hairband

When a young lady named Bland
Lost a pretty little pink hairband,
And the wife of vicar Ted
Found it in the marital bed.
The vicar he just couldn’t understand …!

Fine Silk Stockings

A young lady wearing fine silk stockings
Said, “the people’s behaviour is truly shocking!
Why do they stare!”.
I said, “dear Claire,
I’ve heard clothes go well with stockings!”.

My Manner

When a young lady whose name is Anna
Said, “Sir, I really don’t like your manner!”.
I said, “I’m sorry for that
But please tell your horrid tomcat
Not to whack me with that old spanner!”.

The Erotic

A young lady who is very exotic
Said, “sir, there can be nothing erotic!”.
Then she took off her dress
Which was strange, I must confess.
As her essay was on the despotic!

Vixen’s Erotic Fiction

A young lady whose name is Vixen
Is well known for her erotic fiction.
When she comes round to mine
We drink lots of fine wine.
And then we engage in some fiction.

Jane Who Is Really Quite Kind

A young lady said,, “you will find
That sometimes, I can be quite kind”.
I said to her, “Jane,
Please put down that cane!
As Its not kind to my behind!”.

Honey Who Likes Men with Money

A young lady whose name is Honey
Only dates men with lots of money.
My friend the actor
Managed to attract her.
But he survives on bread an honey!

When the Beautiful and Adventurous Miss Shilling

When the beautiful and adventurous Miss Shilling
Said, “sir, I am ready and willing!”.
I said, “that’s real great!
Come and join in Kate!
These rides on the fair are thrilling!”

A Young Lady from London City

A young lady from London city
Is sweet and really quite pretty.
She’s known as choosy Suzie
But, when she gets boozy
We date in great London city!