Tag Archives: funny poem

An interruption

As many of you will know, I gave my first reading at Poetry Unplugged (hosted by the Poetry Café), on Tuesday 22 March. All of the audience where respectful of their fellow attendees, with the exception of one who caused a disturbance. The below poem is about that reprehensible individual!

It is late.
I stand up to read
And hear the rattle of a plate!
Who could be so rude
As to intrude
In to my first reading?!
‘Tis one of the audience who are feeding!

You my four legged friend
Can not pretend
It wasn’t you
Who
Your appetite
Did sate
When you ate
A cake!

Surely Trigger
Your stomach grows bigger.
You must have no soul
For you gobbled a cake, whole!

Shady Sadie

There was a young lady called Sadie
With a past more than a little shady.
I said “Let us marry
And no longer tarry”.
She made reply
With a scornful sigh
“I would rather die
Than to your arms fly.
Besides, I long ago did marry
A man named Barry
And I am married still
To your best friend Bill”!

Christmas Dinner (Humour, not to be taken seriously)

Happy Christmas to all my followers. I wish you all a peaceful festive season and much joy for the coming year.
The below poem was, needless to say written with my tongue firmly in my cheek and should not be taken seriously. I in no manner whatsoever condone animal cruelty.

I shall sit upon a chocolate log
As I stuff my faithful dog.
I shall the turkey walk
As my thought
Revolves around
A question most profound
Where should I the stuffing put
As regards my loyal mut!

The Bad Poet (Humour)

He tried to make his verse rhyme

But it became worser and worser.

‘Twas perverse

To see

Dog rhyme with tree.

He cudgelled his brains to produce poetry fine

And was convinced beer rhymes with wine.

Inspiration from the great poets he took

And was certain Emily Dickinson

Was Brontae’s sister

And Heathcliff could not resist her.

Finally from the top of Wuthering Heights

He jumped

Hitting the moors with a plop

But his bad poems

Just would not halt.

It was his very great fault

He did not decease

And leave his readers in tranquillity!

 

A Gentleman Suitor To His Beloved

A Gentleman Suitor To His Beloved

 

 

 

“My darling, let us sit down upon the grass.

Though the firmament fall, my love for thee tis sure to last.

Other men may betray, but my heart is steadfast.

Let us be quick my sweet, for I must dash”.

 

 

The Lady’s Response To Her Suitor

 

 

“Sweetheart, the ground is wet and cold,

To recline upon it would quite ruin my clothes.

The heavens show no sign of falling,

Besides, I hear mama calling”.