Tag Archives: funny poem

The School Ghoul

A boy who attended my old school

Once claimed to have seen a ghoul!

That place wasn’t Eton

So he wasn’t beaten.

But the headmaster called him a fool!

 

 

Amy Who Said She Would Never Blame Me!

I am dating a girl named Amy

Who said she would never blame me!

 I had an affair with Claire

And a fling with Miss Ling,

And Amy she really did blame me!
.

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

When a Brave Young Nurse Named Maude

When a brave young nurse named Maude

Found Death lurking on a hospital ward,

Her and Miss Ling

Grabbed some strong string

And tied him up on that ward!
.

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

Naughty Lorna

A naughty young lady named Lorna

Works in a sordid old sauna.

She provides more than massage

At a most reasonable charge,

And the vicar he’s dating Lorna …!
.

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

The Strange Pet

There was a young lady of Tibet

Who was known for her strange pet.

She crossed a pyjama

With a Tibetan Llama.

She did it just for a bet!
.

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

There Once was a Man from Norwich

There once was a man from Norwich

Who was extremely fond of his porridge.

 When they fed him Weetabix

He hit them with sticks

So they kicked him out of Norwich!

.

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

Hospital Humour

I know a pretty nurse in red

Who said, “you must get into bed!”.

I said, “that sounds nice!

But what is your vice!”,

Then she beat me around the head!

,

Copyright: Kevin Morris.

I am bored.

I am bored, but alive

And appear to thrive.

The hospital food is good,

But too much pud

Will make me very fat,

So I avoid that!

..

I don’t miss my beer

As much as I thought I would,

But I wish I could

Make the day less drear with beer!

..

I hear the seagulls cry

And I would fly

Away if I could

But I am stuck here

In this place drear.

Yet I am still alive

And appear to thrive!

..

Copyright: Kevin Morris.