Tag Archives: nonsense verse

When My Friend, Whose Name is Louise

My friend, whose name is Louise
Is always ready and willing to please.
When I found her in bed
We both turned bright red.
And the vicar spoke of his bees!

Anthologised

When anthologised
The poet’s work survives.
He dies.
But every pure thought
(And kink)
Is, forever caught
In ink.
Therefore, I think
That the poet, most wise
Ought to shrink
From being anthologised …

There Was A Young Lady Of Dover

There was a young lady of Dover
Who was fond of rolling in clover.
A cow called Lou
Gave her a chew,
So she left off rolling in clover!

When Lou Lost Her Shoe

When a young lady named Lou
Lost a brand new high-heel shoe,
The good bishop Paul
Spoke of the fall.
And returned that shoe to Lou!

Lockdown Humour

When a young lady named Ria
Said, “I shall in love and beer
Spend this second lockdown”,
She made me frown.
As its me who buys the beer!

Pat’s Bat

When a young man named Pat
Threatened me with a large bat
I said, “put down that mammal
Or I shall loose my camel!”.
So pat put down that bat!

A Young Lady With Morals Most Loose

A young lady with morals most loose
Likes to ride around on a goose.
My friend calls her Clair,
And the vicar Miss Flair.
And sometimes I ride on her goose!

When A Young Lady Named Miss Heather

When a young lady named Miss Heather
Said, “I don’t like this cold weather”.
A most wicked man called Ted
Said, “its warm in my bed”.
But I don’t know whether Miss Heather …

A Need to Confess

A young lady wearing a short dress
Said, “I’ve many a sin to confess!”.
I said, “my dear Miss Lou
That is a matter for you.
But don’t mention you, me and Bess!”.

An Old Poet Playing on The Flute

An old poet playing on the flute
Said, as he pulled on his boot,
“That pretty Miss Glover
Makes a good lover.
But she has stolen my other boot!”.