I once met a sad old vampire
Who said, “I have lost all desire
To drink men’s blood”.
I said, “that’s good!”.
But I still didn’t trust that vampire!”
I Once Met a Sad Old Vampire
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Tag Archives: humour
When I Took My Labrador for a Walk
When I took my Labrador for a walk
We engaged in a jolly good old talk.
I said to him, “Apollo!
Your stomach is too hollow!”,
He said, “pass me that knife and fork!”
Into Space
I know a young lady named Grace
Who said, “do take me into space!”.
So we went to the moon.
But it was over too soon.
But that’s often the way with Grace …!
When a Young Lady in a Rush
When a young lady in a rush
Said, “lets get amorous in this bush”,
It sounded quite jolly.
But o! what folly!
As that bush was a holly bush!
The Alligator and My Calculator
I once met a very large alligator
Who asked could he borrow my calculator.
I said to him, “mate
Please go and eat Kate.
She’ll taste much nicer than my calculator!”.
A Young Lady Who is Really Nice
A young lady who is really nice
Is known for her love of spice.
Her name is Miss Lott
And she likes it hot.
And she also likes curry and rice!
The Importance of Hope!
There once was a man named Hope
Who jumped out of a large envelope.
He gave a great shout,
Which caused quite a rout!
Then returned by post to Good Hope!
When a Wicked Old Rake Known as Winning
When a wicked old rake known as Winning
Said, “I’ve lost count of all the women
I have taken to bed”.
A young lady in red, said,
“With me you will not be winning, Winning!”.
Alexa Says it Won’t Rain Today
Alexa says it won’t rain today.
I put my coat on anyway.
Sure enough, it rains again.
Should I maintain
My faith in the reliability
Of modern technology?
No, today I shall pray
To the god of rain
And silently blast
The weather forecast!
Do that Again
When a beautiful young lady named Gwen
Said, “please go and do that again!”,
A writer called White
Smiled with great delight,
As again, he reached for his pen.
K Morris - Poet 