Tag Archives: humour

A Clown’s Sad Demise

When a clown whose name was Moat

Sang as he sank in a boat,

His friend Guy

Began to cry,

At the loss of his new boat …

The Dissolute Young Man and His Lute

There once was a man most dissolute

Who liked to play on his lute.

When the young women came round

You would hear a sweet sound

As he skillfully played on his lute!

Leigh Who Has Composed a Poem All About Me

A young lady whose name is Leigh

Has composed a poem all about me.

Her verse is so bad

That its driven critics mad,

And now they are all blaming me …!

Lou Who Wore 1 Sock and 1 Shoe

There was a young lady named Lou

Who wore 1 sock and one shoe.

On the other foot

She carefully put

A clock which matched with Lou’s shoe!

There Once Was a Police Constable Named Rose

There once was a police constable named Rose

Who was well known for wearing plain clothes.

A man called Matt

Wore only his hat,

And got arrested by Rose in plain clothes …!

Middle-aged Men

When middle-aged men

(Their minds on sinning),

Flirt with young women,

Some humour them.

While others embrace

The grace

And charms

Of wealthy arms …

Wet Through

When a young lady named Lou

Said, “we are all wet through!”,

Lou and Miss Rose

Took off their clothes,

Then the vicar he married those two!

Being Known

As I strolled through the great Crystal Palace

I met with a young lady named Alice.

When she gave me a wink

And said, “me and Miss Spink?”,

I said, “I’m known here in Crystal Palace …!.

Keith the Thief

There was a young man named Keith

Who was known as a prodigious thief,

Until Miss Rose and Miss Hocking

Tied him up with their stockings,

Which delighted that young man named Keith!

 

 

There was a young man named Keith

Who was known as a prodigious thief,

Until Miss Rose and Miss Hocking

Tied him up with their stockings,

Which caused that thief Keith to cease!

There is Deep Mud

There is deep mud

In the park again.

As I wade through flood

I sigh

And cudgel my poor brain

To explain

Why we poets romanticise

This thing called rain!