There once was a poet named Moat
Who rode around on a great goat.
When they said, “your verse,
It grows worse and worse!”,
He would smile and blame that goat!
The Poet’s Goat
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Tag Archives: humour
Voltaire
As I walked through Trafalgar Square
I met the ghost of Voltaire.
I said, “are you Candide?”.
He said, “no sir! Indeed!
I am Voltaire! haunting Trafalgar Square!”
Great Poetry
When a young lady known as Kate
Said, “I think your poetry is great!”,
I said to her, “honey,
Are you looking for money?”,
And she winked at me did Kate …!
The Clever Cow
I once met a clever cow
Who said, “I don’t know how
All of my milk
Is smooth as silk!”,
I said, “wow! A talking cow!”
When I Met a Ghost in a Churchyard
When I met a ghost in a churchyard
Who said, “being dead is so very hard!
I always try to be friendly,
But everyone’s so scared of me!”,
I ran at great speed from that churchyard!
When a Pushy Young Author Named Lee
When a pushy young author named Lee
Said, “I demand that you support me!”,
I said, “life is brief
And it ends in grief.
Now Lee, do accept this fifty pea!”
When My Dear Old Aunt Named Kate
When my dear old aunt named Kate
Died and left me her whole estate,
I received a broken pencil
And a very empty till,
And an IOU from my aunt Kate!
A Young Lady of Toulouse
I know a young lady of Toulouse
Who is extremely fond of her booze.
Whilst drunk on Hock
She lost her frock,
And a monk he stole her shoes!
Dogs and Ponds
My dog of whom I am extremely fond
Has a habit of jumping in the pond.
Then he gets a certain smell
Which I know all too well,
And of which I am not that fond!
(A couple of days ago I took my guide dog Apollo for a walk in Crystal Palace park with my friend and his Rhodesian Ridgeback. Being a Labrador Retriever, Apollo decided that it would be tremendous fun to go swimming in a pond, twice!)
The Bishop’s Ceiling
When a naked young lady from Ealing
Went and swung from the bishop’s ceiling,
A spinster called Hocking
Found it most shocking!
And the bishop gazed at the ceiling!
K Morris - Poet 