When I met a young lady named Lin
Who said, “I’m not in to sin”,
I said, “neither am I”,
And winked my good eye,
And wept, which was down to the gin!
Tag Archives: humorous verse
Saturday Morning Humour
When I met a group of young women
Who said, “we are in to sinning”,
I made reply,
“No saint am I,
But my hair is gray and thinning!”.
—
When I met a group of young women
Who said, “we are in to sinning”,
I said, with a laugh,
“Please, vacate my bath!”,
Which led to a good deal of grinning!
—
I know a young lady named Samantha
Who behaves just like a pantha.
Whilst in my bedroom
And scented with sweet perfume,
But that’s enough about Samantha . . .
I Know A Young Man Named Monk
I know a young man named Monk
Who composes verse whilst extremely drunk,
As a pretty young barmaid
(Who is far from staid)
Entertains both me and Monk!
A Young Lady Named Ling
A young lady named Ling
Has invited me to swing,
But having looked all around
I can see no fairground,
So know not how to swing!
A Most Distinguished Aristocratic Old Maid
A most distinguished aristocratic old maid
Thinks it vulgar to engage in trade,
But I happen to know
That her great grandfather Joe,
Made his money by engaging in trade!
There Was A Young Man Named Glass
There was a young man named Glass
Who appeared on a rather remarkable podcast.
There being absolutely no sound
It was very profound,
And the critics all raved about Glass!
When I Said To My Friend Lou
When I said, to my friend Lou,
(Who is fond of the stiletto shoe),
“You are rather witty,
Though not very pretty”,
She threw at me her shoe!
As I Walked Through The Graveyard Last Night
As I walked through the graveyard last night
I met a young woman in white.
As she arose from her grave
With a ghoul called Dave
I said, “do you fancy a drink tonight?”
—
As I walked through the graveyard last night
I saw a young woman in white.
As she arose from her grave
I said, “my soul I must save!”,
Then I ran like the clappers last night!
A Poet Named Mark
There once was a poet named Mark
Whose verse was extremely dark,
So they sent him to sea
On a rotten old tree,
Where he was eaten by a shark!
—
I know a young man named Mark
Whose verse is extremely dark.
He sails the great sea
On a rotten old tree,
And plays upon his harp!
How Convenient To Have A Graveyard So Close To My Home
How convenient to have a graveyard
So close to my home.
‘Twill not be hard
As, when I die
There will not be far to go
For my bones
But, you know
The place has remained undisturbed
By burials for many a year.
I am perturbed
And shed a tear
As I do not know
Where I shall go
When I die.
Perhaps my ashes will, in a pub find a place
And the drinker, with his or her flushed face
Will look at me and say,
“He used to drink this way.
Another beer
Here barman, for I feel suddenly queer
And must drink
Else I shall think
On dust
And he, who has into the grave been thrust!”.
I dislike
The idea of fire
And my desire
Is for burial. Yet the night
Will come down all the same
So why should I care
Whether I am consumed by flame
Or end up underground?
For the truth profound
Is that I will not be there
To know or care.