A man in a boat on a moat
Went and wrote a poem on his goat.
But the poem was not profound
And the poet he sadly drowned
And the police they are questioning the goat!
The Sad Demise of a Poet
4 Replies
Tag Archives: funny poetry
Speculate to Accumulate
FOWC with Fandango — Speculate – This, That, and the Other (fivedotoh.com)
I met a young lady named Kate
Who said, “you must speculate to accumulate!”.
So I spent all my money
On Kate and Miss Honey.
And now I own just a plate!
The Charms of a Young Lady’s Arms
I met a young lady of Sheffield
Who said, “all the men they yield
To the sweet charms
Of my warm arms”.
I said, “what! In this muddy field!”
An Innocent Drink
I met a young lady named Belle
In the bar of a seedy hotel.
We spent our time
Discussing rhyme over wine,
Now the papers feature me with Belle!
Everyone Needs a Good Workman
There was a young man named Nool
Who was famous for his versatile tool.
A spinster called Shilling
Employed him for drilling
As she’d heard of Nool’s versatile tool!
The Sculptor
There once was a very fine sculptor
Who was famous for owning a vulture.
The vulture called Mat
Wore a top hat.
He really was a very fine sculpture!
Whilst Attending My Old Boarding School
Whilst attending my old boarding school
I knew a most ghastly ghoul.
As the clock struck midnight
He’d play with the light,
Which was strictly against the rule!
Squire Ray
There once was an old squire named Ray
Who liked to go shooting all day.
His handsome butler called Morgan
Was good on the organ,
And the squire’s wife she loved to play!
Lost Bras
I know a young lady named Marr
Who is always losing her bra.
She is known to be sporty
And I’ve heard that she’s naughty
And the vicar he’s wearing a bra …!
On Being Stung by a Large Bumblebee
On being stung by a large Bumblebee
On a part you will never see!
I jumped in the water
With the vicar’s pretty daughter,
Who was nude as nude can be!
K Morris - Poet 