Tag Archives: funny poetry

The Bed Tester

I met a young lady of Chester

Who is known as a bed tester.

When I found her in mine

It was after much wine

Singing songs with a jester from Manchester!

Jealousy Among the Vegetables

There once was a Gladioli called Gladdis

Who fell in love with a radish.

But a jealous old cabbage

Turned really quite savage,

As he loved that Gladioli named Gladdis!

 

 

 

 

There Once Was a Poet Named Hind

There once was a poet named Hind

Who said, “the best is all behind!

My once great verse

It grows steadily worse!

And the critics all kick my behind!”.

Youthful Passion

Their youthful passion unlocks.

She loses shoes and frock.

Then the vicar knocks …!

Arty

When I attended a singles swingers party

With the great and the somewhat arty,

A young lady named Claire

Tied me up with Flair.

Those knots they were really quite arty!

Miss Ice

A young lady known as Miss Ice

Has a reputation for not being nice.

Her real name is Coral

And she’s so very immoral!

But to me she’s always been nice …!

Shy Guy

I met a group of young women

Who spoke of the joys of sinning.

But I, being shy

Hid in a pie

With the beautiful and talented Miss Winning!

Bad Poetry

When a rude and unfeeling young lad

Said, “your poems are so very bad!”.

I wept full sore

And said, “tell me more!”,

As I soundly thrashed that lad!

When a Young Lady Said, “Lets Pretend!”

As we drove fast round a very tight bend

A young lady said, “lets pretend I’m your girlfriend!”.

I said, “in this sports car

You and I will go far!”,

She said, “remember that this is only pretend!”

Grace’s Place

When a gorgeous young lady named Grace

Invited me back to her place,

I met with the Devil,

Who was not on the level!

But I enjoyed my time with Grace!