There once was a man with a goat
Who went and wrote a very important note.
But the goat said, “I’m starving.
I will pay you 1 farthing!”.
So he did, and he ate that note!
The Man and the Goat
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Tag Archives: funny poems
Snooty Miss Glass
an extremely snooty young lady named Glass
Said, “you are so very working class!”.
My good friend Miss Kate
Said, “he owns an estate!”.
And now I am married to Glass!
The New Club
A new sex club has opened near me
And the locals are angry as can be!
But I hear from Miss Grub
That it’s a very good club,
So I’m going with the vicar to see …
I Once Met a Dog Drinking Beer
I once met a dog drinking beer
Who said, “do you know Miss Ria?”.
I said, “she’s divine
And fond of wine.
But dogs they should not drink beer!”
When a Snobby Young Lady
When a snobby young lady known as Lou
Went and stood in some very strong glue,
And she said to us all,
“I am stuck to this wall!”.
We said, “you’ve always been stuck up Lou!”
Cook’s New Poetry Book
When a poet whose name was Cook
Went and published a new poetry book,
And a young man called Frank
Said, “the pages are all blank!”.
“That’s because it’s blank verse!”, said Cook.
The Monk and the Skunk
When I met an extremely drunk old monk
Who went an threatened me with his skunk,
And I said to Hocking,
“His behaviour is really shocking!”.
She said, “whose? The monk or the skunk!”
I Once Met a Very Bad Lad
I once met a very bad lad
Who said, “your poetry makes me sad!”.
I said to him “Moore!
You are a terrible bore!”,
As I soundly beat that bad lad!
Me, the Squire and Moriah
As I sat by a blazing fire
With the squire and his housemaid Moriah,
I said to her, “Rose!
You are wearing no clothes!”.
She said, “yes! But my name’s Moriah!”
The Rude Ghoul
I once met a very rude ghoul
Who insisted on calling me a fool.
I said, “if you persist
I shall call an exorcist
And then we’ll see whose the fool!”
K Morris - Poet 