Tag Archives: funny poem

The Ferryman

When a ferryman who sailed the great river Styx

Went and pelted me and my mates with bricks,

Me and Moat

Sank his boat,

Which now lies at the bottom of the Styx!

Lost Shoes

A young lady who is fond of booze

Lost her stiletto shoes in the river Ouse.

Now a naughty nun

Wears them for fun –

We met on a round the world cruise!

Matt’s Cat

When a young man known as Matt

Went and bought a very large cat,

An elderly person called Brian

Yelled something about a lion!

And that was the end of that!

Whilst Engrossed in Wuthering Heights

Whilst engrossed in Wuthering Heights

I saw a young lady in tights.

I said to her, “Rose!

You are wearing no clothes!”,

She said, “no! I am wearing some tights!”

 

Humid

It is humid.

The forecast predicts thunder.

I long for cooling rain

And wonder

Whether the great Thor

Will roar

Or will the weather forecast

Be wrong again!

Whilst Walking Through a very Dark Park

Whilst walking through a very dark park

I met with a vampire named Mark.

When I began to pray

He said, “it’s a play!”,

But the werewolves howled in that park …!

A Young Lady of Toulouse

I know a young lady of Toulouse

Who is extremely fond of her booze.

Whilst drunk on Hock

She lost her frock,

And a monk he stole her shoes!

The Bishop’s Ceiling

When a naked young lady from Ealing

Went and swung from the bishop’s ceiling,

A spinster called Hocking

Found it most shocking!

And the bishop gazed at the ceiling!

Ron the Poet

There once was a poet named Ron

Who said, “poetry is for everyone!”,

But when he wrote on a bus

The driver created such a fuss!

As he didn’t like poetry or Ron!

Miss Rusty

When a young lady known as Rusty

Said, “you Sir are old and crusty!”.

I said to her, “Miss,

Some girls bring great bliss.

But you Miss are so very rusty!”