There was a young lady called Claire
Who met me on the stair.
Her sister Lou
Saw us two
And gave a knowing stare …
—
There was a young lady called Clare
Who met me on the stair.
My mistress Lou
Was feeling blue
So joined us on the stair …
There was a young lady called Claire
With whom I had an affair.
Her best friend Lou
Joined we two
Along with a girl named Flair!
There was a young lady called Claire
With whom I had an affair.
When her husband Drew
Caught us two
He kicked me down their stair!
There was a young lady called Claire
Who had very long blonde hair.
At nesting time
I wrote a rhyme
For the birds that nested there …
There was a young lady called Claire
Who’s feet where always bare.
She went for an interview
Without any shoe.
I know as I was there!
—
I knew a young lady called Claire
Who’s feet where invariably bare.
She walked on hot coals
While playing at bowls.
I know as I was there!
—
There was a young lady called Claire
Who’s feet where always bare.
She was a dancer by profession
And I must make a confession
For I am that young lady Claire!
There was a young lady called Claire
Who point blank refused to swear.
She met a man named Dan,
Who had an extremely naughty plan,
Which nearly made Claire swear!
There was a young lady called Claire
Who married an elderly billionaire.
She spent his money on shoes
And many a world cruise.
He tripped, and died on the stair …!
There was a young lady called Claire
Who fell asleep while climbing the stair.
Should you ask me why
I shall make reply,
“How would I know, I wasn’t there!”
