Tag Archives: nonsense verse

When A Young Lady Named Lou

When a young lady named Lou
Married an elderly vicar called Drew,
All the bridesmaids got very drunk,
And a rather disreputable old monk,
Waltzed with a girl called Sue!

When a young lady named Joan

When a young lady named Joan
Said, “please, just leave me alone!”,
And I replied, “whatever you say”,
She wept, “oh, do please stay!”,
She’s a strange young lady is Joan!

The Poets Rest

A publican whose name is Best
Runs a pub called the Poets Rest.
It is full of great débauche
And I think that perhaps I ought,
To stop drinking in the Poets Rest!

A barmaid whose name is Best
Works in the Poets Rest.
It is full of great débauche
So I think that I ought
Not to tell the rest!

When A Young Man Named Gus

When a young man named Gus
Quoted Thomas Malthus on the bus,
A few passengers fell sound asleep
Whilst others did most bitterly weep,
But the driver he didn’t fuss!

When A Young Lady Named Gale

When a young lady named Gale
Said, “my dog has no tail”,
And I replied, “are you having an affair?”
She said, “I think I now remember where,
My dog he left his tail!”.

When A Beautiful Young Lady Named May

When a beautiful young lady named May
Remarked, “I shall be famous one day!”,
A rake called Ned
Said, “come to bed”,
But May had no time to stay!

A Young Lady Whose Name Is Ling

A young lady whose name is Ling
Tied me up in the budding spring,
And when the summer came
She did exactly the same.
I wonder what the autumn will bring?

I Know A Young Lady Named Hortense

I know a young lady named Hortense
Whose poems just do not make sense!
She writes them in latin
Whilst dressed in pink satin,
And they’re all in the present tense!

I know a young lady named Hortense
Whose poems just do not make sense!
She writes them in latin
Whilst dressed in pink satin,
And I wish she’d mend my fence!